What do you call a man with boiled beef and carrots shaped to resemble the Mona Lisa on his head?
Stewart
What do you call a man with a lavatory on his head ?
Lou !
John (in America)
And worse of all:::What do you call an Asian woman with half a eaten fanny on her head.
Minjeeta
Thanks for your suggestion.Good luck on everything.
Spam links removed
What do you call a spammer who can't even insert an url properly?
What do you a Korean, Russian, Greek master of seduction?
Soon Getya Knickersoff
What do you call a man with a piece of meat on his head?
Hamhead
What do you call a man with two pieces of meat on his head?
Mohamhead
What do you call a man, with no arms and legs, in a hole?
Phil.
What do you call a woman sitting in a bath of Martini?
Olive
What do you call a woman sitting on a loaf of bread?
Marge
:-)
What do you call a poster who resurrects a 2 year old thread with his/ her first post?
Son of Freve!
What do you call a man with a short knob?
Justin 
with a chicken in each ear?
I thought these had died a death years ago............
Oh, f**k it
What do you call a woman with a pint of lager balanced in one hand, a pint of bitter in the other and a pint of Guinness on her head?
Beatrix
And so..........what do you call the same woman who is now also holding a snooker cue?
Beatrix Potter.
What do you call a man with a spade on his head?
Mentally ill.
What do you call a man without a spade on his head?
A man.
What do you call a man who collects coins? - A numismatist.
What do you call a man who collects old coins? - An oldmismatist.
What do you call a man with no legs?
Dirty Dick.
What do you call a woman with no legs?
Fanny Walker.
Made me laugh anyway
... who is a Russian surgeon specialising in vasectomies?
Ivan Nackovnickinemoff