Jobseekers - Sketch

Hi all, I'm new here and this is my first offering. Any help developing this idea would be appreciated.

A radio sketch in which an documentary maker interviews a scottish jobseeker.

INTERVIEWER:
Tell me, how long have you been out of work Joe?

JOE:
Well, you tell me hen, if I've never been in work how can I noo be oot o it?

INTERVIEWER:
So you've never had a job then, no voluntary work or even a paper round?

JOE:
I don't give anything away for free and why would I deliver governmental propaganda eh? The point is the government forces are expecting me to do somethin' I've never done before which I find unacceptable!

INTERVIEWER:
Hmm. Some people would argue that the government are only expecting you to contribute to society and provide for yourself.

JOE:
Exactly! I'm glad you agree with me... I've never worked a day and now they expect me to be able to do seven or more in a week! Unacceptable!!

INTERVIEWER:
Everyone has to start somewhere Joe, have you tried the Job Centre?

JOE:
Have I tried it! Been tried by it more like. See me and the Job Centre are huvin' a wee dispute at the minute regarding the continualisation of ma job seeking allowance.

INTERVIEWER:
What sort of dispute? Have they stopped your payments?

JOE(becomes irate)
Those fascists sitting doon there in their ivory tower of doom have ceased ma pay due to me not actively seeking work! I don't know what else I'm supposed to do. Once a fortnight I have to walk doon there when I could be in the hoose doing training.

INTERVIEWER:
Training?

JOE:
Aye, training, I haven't missed an episode of Homes under the Hammer for two years. Now if a job as an auctionist were to come up I would know exactly how to bang that wee hammer. Training!

INTERVIEWER:
Have you completed any other training Joe?

JOE:
Well I don't want tae blow ma own trumpet, although I probably could after watchin Sonya fae EastEnders at it for all they years but I have been puttin' a load o effort in to preparating myself for my dream job.

INTERVIEWER:
Tell us more about your dream job Joe. What would you really like to do?

JOE:
Astronaut.

INTERVIEWER:
Astronaut?

JOE:
Astronaut.

INTERVIEWER:
Astronauts train for many years Joe, its a very demanding job.

JOE:
Tell me about it! I didnae get through the back catalogue of Battlestar Galactica in an afternoon you know! In a way I feel over qualified as I've put in the hours on that Apollo 13 as well but the Job Centre don't want to know.

INTERVIEWER:
And have the Job Centre offered much help in finding you a way into employment?

JOE:
No really no, they wouldnae even consider my request for extra money for training resources.

INTERVIEWER:
What resources had you planned to invest any extra money in?

JOE:
My TV license..

INTERVIEWER:
Thanks for your time Joe and good luck with the job hunt.

JOE:
Aye cheerio... Am I getting paid for this?

END

There's a top idea in. There the idea of a jobless guy training for work by watching telly is aces

The rest is a bit by the numbers

And make the interviewer a bit less hectoring

I thought it was good, but I agree you could develop the TV training a wee bit more.

Thankyou both for the feedback, über helpful.

I've edited my original post to reflect some changes and would be eternally grateful for some more help.

I can assure you I won't keep on re writing it on this thread. Last one. Honest.

I like the additional material about the programmes he has watched for his training. There's a lot of scope there for more jokes, maybe you could put him in a job interview context too.

Like it. Joe's ace. Good luck to him. I hope all his efforts pay off in the end.

Is the fact he's a Jock important?
I only say this as I find the dialect gets in the way a little.

The Jock thing isnt that imporant its just how he sounds in my head and if I were acting the piece its how I'd play it. I'd have no problem in tidying up the dialogue if it were required.

Thanks to those who read it and provided feedback. The character is really growing on me and I've got loads of ideas building. Particularly in the job interview area (thanks for that one!)

Make sure he's not too similar to Rab Nesbitt, mind!

Quote: beaky @ February 20 2013, 7:55 PM GMT

Make sure he's not too similar to Rab Nesbitt, mind!

View original

Its funny you should say that as I actually had Jamsie in my mind while writing it!

It reminded me very much of a Jamesie rant. Seems a bit unfocussed. You might be in with a good idea with the watching TV to train bit. As others have said. Maybe make that the characters main angle.