FLAT - My latest attempt at a TV sitcom. Page 11

Quote: James Williams @ February 4, 2008, 5:04 PM

... nor did I particularly enjoy being personally mocked in a parody of my own script.

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I guess you are referring to me. I'm sorry you feel I intended to mock, but your interpretation is again wrong. Anway I might argue this thread has correctly become the target of parody as it is over bloated with too much length and bruised ego. The point of the whole board is to critique, not critique the critiques. If you don't like the replies the answer is to ignore them not keep bumping a thread until it gets ridiculous and personal.

I'm not very keen on Autistic being used as a term of abuse.

I'm not very keen on God but he keeps talking to me, and he swears alot

The carping on this thread is all a bit pathetic, james doesnt have to accept anyones suggestions as being better than his own, if he thinks his piece is a work of comic genius and wants to stick with it then its up to him; theres nothing wrong with being confident in your own work and thinking your own ideas have more merit than those thrown at him by strangers! Why is everyone so annoyed that he doesnt agree with some of the crits? Hes not obligated to. Anyway . . .

The irony is that while I've been accused of being too precious, I have actually listened to much of the criticism and improved the script as a result...

... whereas some of the critiquers simply cannot accept that I don't agree with *everything* they say. It's *their* egos that are bruised.

Seefacts: your comment that I have accepted the "good" critique and rejected the "bad" makes no sense. I take critique like: "Too many characters in the opening scene", "not enough jokes", "first scene needs more punch" for instance to be 'negative' comments that I have acted on, whether I've been successful or not.

Rob B: "I'm sorry you feel I intended to mock, but your interpretation is again wrong." Give me a break. You didn't intend to mock?!?! I can take a joke but in the context of the thread some of the comments are simply inappropriate and personal; it seems like people wish to bait me. It's at best thoughtless.

I believe it's called "gang mentality".

Winterlight - scene 2 is too long and I'm thinking about how to change it. I still fail to see how a voodoo dildo is not funny though

I'll stop looking at this thread and keep my big mouth shut!

Quote: Chimes of Freedom @ February 4, 2008, 6:43 PM

If we divide the world's population very broadly into idiots and non-idiots, it's fair to say that when a non-idiot is asked for advice by someone who consistently rejects and derides that advice, he'll probably cease to offer advice to that person, right?

On that basis, it's likely that James's writing will eventually be reviewed only by idiots.

So what's the point of his posting anything?

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Oh give it a rest, surely people have better things to do? Like james has said, hes taken on board some crit, rejected others; theres an end to it. He doesnt have to accept other peoples opinions as better than his own! Why is this difficult to take? Anyway, not my script so I cant be arsed going on with this, Ill leave you to your squabbles.

JAMES

Show us your hairy ass!

Quote: Chimes of Freedom @ February 4, 2008, 6:49 PM

Wait!!!!

We need you to review James's future writings!

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Hope that was just good humour, and not a reference to your earlier post, in which case youre calling me an idiot. Because that would be beyond pathetic, but Ill give you the benefit of the doubt.

James - it seems you cannot get the critique you are looking for, although you have incorporated some ideas.

I suggest you use a professional like Mark Blake if you can afford it, at least it will be written by someone who knows what they are talking about and are (hopefully) objective.

All the best.

Quote: jacparov @ February 4, 2008, 7:20 PM

I suggest you use a professional like Mark Blake if you can afford it, at least it will be written by someone who knows what they are talking about and are (hopefully) objective.

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Knows what he's talking about? - He's had the same amount of sitcom commissions as most of us - none.

Objective - what, when you're paying him?

From reading his site it seems he talks the talk, but I don't see him walking the walk - unless appearing on Weapons of Mass Distraction - one of the worst pieces of television comedy I've ever seen - counts.

He's no more of an expert then most of us to be honest. He reads it and comments on it, is it that hard merely HAVING AN OPINION?! Is that hard to comment on structure - "I found it confusing", is that a difficult opinion to formulate?

Just because you're paying him and he as a website, doesn't make him an expert. He's a written a few books, that's about it.

I only mentioned him because he is the only one I know of. Plus having a few books published is more than I and alot of others on here have and are likely, ever to do.

Quote: jacparov @ February 4, 2008, 7:37 PM

Plus having a few books published is more than I and alot of others on here have and are likely, ever to do.

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Good to see you're aiming high.

James - do you look at your script and think it's as good as a television comedy that you really like yourself?

A thought from the left field.

Sitcom to me is about the hardest area of writing creatively. You have to take 4-5 characters, and craft them and their world so well that they will be funny pretty much in and of them selves. No development no growth, a perfect comedy set up frozen in time.

That is f**king hard.

Way harder than sketches, plays, stand up etc.

Sit com is also deeply personal. Almost all good sitcoms have relied on human relationships, and emotional life. You can not write that stuff with out out putting a fairly generous part of you self into it.

As such perhaps the passion in this thread comes partially from the fact that we are all debating, something that is not only deeply personal but really hard to write.

And as critics the emotive nature of sitcom may draw us in more on a emotional level then we like to admit.

Most of the stuff I write now in sitcom I know ain't good enough I'm hoping to develop the skills over some years.

lol, just being realistic from a statistical point of view.

Plus to be honest I see people like Little miss joceyln and Marc Wooton getting commisioned and broadcast and i am a million miles away from there. I just don't think it's funny and I don't want to be like that. Pretentious but there you go.

Quote: Chimes of Freedom @ February 4, 2008, 7:42 PM

Just because someone is a 'professional' doesn't mean he's any good. If anyone disagrees, there are several professional tradesmen I can send round to make a complete balls up of any job you give them.

Go out into the street and pick 100 people at random - rich, poor, clever, thick, posh, common, whatever - and I guarantee you that every single one of them will be perfectly qualified to tell you what makes him/her laugh and what doesn't.

When a large number of people (with no axe to grind) tell you you're not funny and nobody's telling you you ARE, you don't need a professional opinion. You need to listen to advice.

I've had a few pops at James but, having seen him on YouTube, I know he's a funny man. I bet he's a hoot to go out with for a pint. I wish him all the luck in the world but he's going to get nowhere in writing if he insists upon responding venomously to criticism.

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True but those 100 people couldn't tell you why it was funny or not, in terms of comedy technique, craft and structure etc.

The debate is fine guys and I've enjoyed what I've seen of the thread but let's be careful about some of the 'hot' words like idiots etc. Remember you're criting the work, NOT the author or the citics, either for or against.

If James does or doesn't accept a crit, he's only doing what we as writers would do anyway, if we believed in our own work.

James, I'm jealous of the activity on this thread