British Comedy Guide

Things that piss you off Page 1,149

The f**king Dingles living next door to me piss me off. Their back garden is like a jungle with little yappy dogs inhabiting it. Where's my shotgun? Ugh!

Another completely different thing that pissed me off is that Celtx keep changing their software, cloud and shit about. So all those half written sitcom scripts I wrote and trusted them with to keep secure have vanished from their servers.

F**k. I put about 10 minutes into all of those scripts and I'll never get that time back...

Errr

Ahem...

The lit end of my fag dropped into my handbag and set it on fire! Suddenly noticed it smoking- Blimey rescued it.

Vans. The school has changed its uniform to allow Vans, and at £45 a pair someone is really taking the piss.

Quote: Nogget @ December 12 2012, 9:27 AM GMT

Vans. The school has changed its uniform to allow Vans, and at £45 a pair someone is really taking the piss.

The cost and rules of school uniforms makes me furious, and I don't even have kids yet! Black/navy trousers or knee-length skirt and a white/black/navy jumper or shirt with any flat black shoes is fine. Let's not stress people into spending f**k loads of money unnecessarily, let's not have this creepy cabal with schools and a designated shop, and let's not turn our children into capitalist whores via the education system before they even reach puberty, thanks.

I have also been pissed off with this

http://uk.lifestyle.yahoo.com/anne-hathaway-upstaged-by-amanda-seyfried-at-les-miserables-premiere-in-new-york-101228542.html

I'm one of the idiots who vaguely likes fashion but the negative comparisons of women and the portrayal of females being in constant competition with each other is just spiteful and needless

upstaged by

stole the show from

on the other hand

We prefer

Ooh, the approval of a yahoo journo! Whoopdef**kingwhoop. I bet that's what Amanda Seyfried has worked her whole life towards. Anne Hathaway must be gutted. She'll probably, like, totes, convert her emails to a hotmail address once she's finished sobbing.

Shame on you Sophia Moir, I hope the females you care about are never made to feel shit as a result of this all-pervasive culture of pitting women against each other and slagging them off from behind the safety of a computer screen in a professional capacity. Jesus wept. And so did AJGO. But not as much as Anne Hathaway. Probably. Maybe. Not likely, actually, but shame on you and everyone who writes these articles anyway.

But if journalists didn't compare frocks how would you know who was the prettiest?

I like frocks. I clicked on the story to see the possibly peculiar frock. I did not expect to see a media professional inventing a lame catfight. There are many things rotten about the portrayal of females (and males) but the casual bitchiness in throw-away articles could quite easily be done away with with no impact other than to make the world, and the media, a slightly less despicable place.

But there's a whole industry built on bitchiness! Think of the unemployment with all those people whose jobs are finding pictures of celebs mid-blink or with a spot. The economy can't take it, AJGO!

Quote: Harridan @ December 12 2012, 12:15 PM GMT

But there's a whole industry built on bitchiness! Think of the unemployment with all those people whose jobs are finding pictures of celebs mid-blink or with a spot. The economy can't take it, AJGO!

That's not what I'm saying. Clearly we need journalists to investigate who these freaks are who go about sometimes having a spot. And don't even get me started on the mutants who blink. In public! While there might be a photographer there! They make me sick.

Quote: AJGO @ December 12 2012, 12:03 PM GMT

I'm one of the idiots who vaguely likes fashion but the negative comparisons of women and the portrayal of females being in constant competition with each other is just spiteful and needless

I can understand your point of view, but I also think there is a biological thing going on here. Some women (not all) have a tendency to go a bit OTT when it comes to outdoing other females to get the most attention. It's probably something in the lizard part of our brains that has to do with attracting potential mates.

It also doesn't help that women visit websites, read articles and watch television shows that perpetuate this form of competition. The only time men are interested in women's dresses are when it's someone like Liz Hurley. Now that was an awesome dress.

Quote: Nogget @ December 12 2012, 9:27 AM GMT

Vans.

Had to look these up, the only vans I know are Ford Transits. They're shoes apparently.

The uniform thing is tricky, but when I went to high school in the US and there was no policy, the difference between the poor kids and the rich kids became readily apparent. Designer brands were used as social weaponry and what you wore determined your sole worth.

Quote: Badge @ December 12 2012, 1:38 AM GMT

Honestly, how much furniture have you broken as a result of your failure to control your anger because of a particular TV show?

Who are you? The Ikea Inspector? I'm not telling you how much furniture I've broken, you might send my details to DFS and I'll get bombarded by sofa spam.

I do agree with AJGO, but I would have been so happy if I'd been allowed to wear my Vans to school!

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ December 12 2012, 2:56 PM GMT

I can understand your point of view, but I also think there is a biological thing going on here. Some women (not all) have a tendency to go a bit OTT when it comes to outdoing other females to get the most attention. It's probably something in the lizard part of our brains that has to do with attracting potential mates.

It also doesn't help that women visit websites, read articles and watch television shows that perpetuate this form of competition. The only time men are interested in women's dresses are when it's someone like Liz Hurley. Now that was an awesome dress.

Cause and effect. There is a fundemental biological reason why the demand for these websites is sufficient to warrent their huge online presence.

In the same manner, the fact that the internet is also filled with videos of Japanese schoolgirls receiving heavy facial loads on packed commuter trains is not the reason why I can't go 24-hours without abusing myself (unless I'm staying at someone else's house, or something).

My naughty bits created the demand, and XHamster provided it.

In a similar manner, the women's naughty bits (ovaries, womb, fallopian tubes and that kinda thing) created the demand for websites where women can incessantly compare themselves to the 'competition', and feel good when chinks in the armour of the 'elite' competitors are exposed.

I don't half talk some bollocks, tbh.

Quote: zooo @ December 12 2012, 3:28 PM GMT

I do agree with AJGO, but I would have been so happy if I'd been allowed to wear my Vans to school!

You might have been, but your parents might not. Vans are only flimsy, canvas crap which wears out too quickly.

No, mine weren't the canvas ones.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ December 12 2012, 2:56 PM GMT

I can understand your point of view, but I also think there is a biological thing going on here. Some women (not all) have a tendency to go a bit OTT when it comes to outdoing other females to get the most attention. It's probably something in the lizard part of our brains that has to do with attracting potential mates.

It also doesn't help that women visit websites, read articles and watch television shows that perpetuate this form of competition. The only time men are interested in women's dresses are when it's someone like Liz Hurley. Now that was an awesome dress.

The basic biology of attracting a mate isn't the beginning and end of evolution. Science has just as much evidence and theories about genes and social co-operation being helpful in a variety of communities whereby women aren't each other's enemy.

I don't visit websites, read articles or watch television shows that pander to the lowest common capitalist denominator of attractiveness or sense of worth. If after signing out of my email I see a headline about a dress I expect it to be a fashion article not a woman writing about two other women who she has no basis for thinking they were competing other than that she has introduced the idea because she's unable to write about fashion rather than how much women should resent each other over a dress.

Quote: SimonWing @ December 12 2012, 3:32 PM GMT

I don't half talk some bollocks, tbh.

Yep.

At my school we had a 16th century uniform design and you when you outgrew your stuff you handed in your old stuff and were given the next size up. One year I got a coat from a boy who hanged himself. Tell your kids they'll wear what they're told and should count their lucky stars! Most schools make life so difficult for the parents, it's ridiculous.

Share this page