We're getting close to Christmas Office Party time in London. A magical time when people who hardly ever drink go absolutely bat shit crazy and start doing shots of tequila for no reason.
People collapsed on the street outside of pubs, drunken office girls staggering along the roads, ambulances taking idiots to hospital, loud twats in suits yelling: 'I know, let's have a worst tie contest!' and my absolute favourite, opening the stall door to see Gary from Accounts on his knees in a puddle of urine snorting coke off a toilet seat.
Fights, crying, drunkards on night buses throwing up on themselves, it's like London is transformed into Newcastle for two whole weeks.