INT. SET. DAY.
WE ARE ON THE SET OF THE LATEST TV REALITY SHOW, 'DUELING BANJOS'. OUR CAMP HOST SIDNEY STANDS CENTER STAGE IN A GAUDY SUIT. BEHIND HIM STAND TWO TUXEDO WEARING CONTESTANTS TIM AND STAN, BOTH HOLDING BANJOS.
SIDNEY
Well this is the moment of truth, viewers. Have you picked Stans exciting version of Gnarls Barkley's Crazy or Tims interesting re-working of 'I Predict a Riot'. How you both feeling gents?
THEY BOTH MANAGE WEAK SMILE.
STAN
A little nervous.
TIM
Slightly terrified.
SIDNEY
Well without further ado.
THE CROWD SHOUT OUT 'ADO' CLEARLY A CATCH PHRASE.
SIDNEY
I shall announce the winner and it's TIM. Congratulations and bad luck Stan we all know what happens to the looser.
THE CROWD ALL SQUEAL, LIKE PIGS.
STAN IS TERRIFIED, HE IS TRYING TO ESCAPE BUT IS RESTRAINED BY TWO BOUNCERS.
SIDNEY (SHOUTING)
Bring on the rednecks.
THREE STEREOTYPICAL AMERICAN REDNECKS APPEAR SLOBBERING AND EAGER. THEY DRAG STAN OFF ROUND THE BACK, HE IS GIBBERING AND SCREAMING. WE PAN BACK TO THE HOST'S FACE.
SIDNEY
Well congratualtions again Tim and we'll see you again next week.
THERE IS A SCREAM FROM BACK STAGE. SIDNEY WINCES.
SIDNEY
Join us again then, for another edition of Dueling Banjoes.
ENDS
