When all else fails I usually say sausages out loud in the middle of the high street a few times, then someone comes along and takes me away for a few weeks and I am right as rain afterwards
I read the news today oh boy! Page 1,082
Quote: sootyj @ December 1 2012, 9:45 PM GMTI hope that green c**t Kermit gets fingered by the police.
I hate the muppets creepy little bastard hanging around Sesame Street all the time.
Please, please- not Kermit! I love Kermit. I have a small Kermit on wheels in the attic. All right, the wheels were once ridden through dog dirt on the pavement by one of the sprogs but we still love him.
I'm pretty sure that away from the cameras Kermit suffered years of physical and sexual abuse at the hands (or trotters) of miss Piggy
She looked the type
You made my night knowing that Kermit is living in a crippled dog shit stained misery style imprisonment in your attic
Execelent
Smash that green dirty birdies feet with a hammer
If any muppet is going to be named on the web surely it's going to be Rowlf?
Slightly surprised at the list of four shows up for best sitcom in the comedy awards. And has 'Grandma's House' not been nominated for anything?!
http://uk.news.yahoo.com/john-mcafee-anti-virus-pioneer-captured-094454698.html
Quote: Matthew Stott @ December 3 2012, 9:57 AM GMTAnd has 'Grandma's House' not been nominated for anything?!
I'm not.
As much as I like Olivia Colman, taking up two of the four best actress slots seems a bit much.
Quote: chipolata @ December 3 2012, 10:00 AM GMTI'm not.
Yeah, but you're wrong about so much.
Oh dear.
Quote: Matthew Stott @ December 3 2012, 10:01 AM GMTAs much as I like Olivia Colman, taking up two of the four best actress slots seems a bit much.
As an awards show, it's always been one of the more entertaining, but the awards themselves are deeply flawed.
Quote: Carlos Manwelly @ December 1 2012, 10:00 PM GMTI think miss piggy is onto it, I heard she is an undercover cop
Undercover 'chop' surely?
In other news, the banks that took £4.4 billion from the Bank Of England to give to home and business owners in loans haven't been passed on to the customers. Now there is a massive surprise.
Quote: Matthew Stott @ December 3 2012, 10:01 AM GMTAs much as I like Olivia Colman, taking up two of the four best actress slots seems a bit much.
Having read through the nominations, 90% of them are for shows / performers that have been around for years and nominated previously. British television comedy is in the toilet.
I suppose if the banks did exactly what the government did we'd be living in a dictatorship.
So erm yay! Go freedom!
Quote: Renegade Carpark @ December 3 2012, 1:15 PM GMTBritish television comedy is in the toilet.
Nah, been a great year. Unfortunately some shows and people have been overlooked.
Quote: Matthew Stott @ December 3 2012, 1:18 PM GMTNah, been a great year.
You are proper mental. 
Quote: sootyj @ December 3 2012, 1:16 PM GMTI suppose if the banks did exactly what the government did we'd be living in a dictatorship.
If they take the government money then they have to be the governmnet bitch. Them the rules.
Quote: Renegade Carpark @ December 3 2012, 1:22 PM GMTYou are proper mental.
It really has, though. Compared to recent years, at least. Lots of strong stuff. (Half of which I bet you haven't seen!)
Quote: Matthew Stott @ December 3 2012, 1:24 PM GMT(Half of which I bet you haven't seen!)
Half of which I gave up on after the first episode - from Noel Fielding's Luxury Comedy to Cardinal Burns to Friday Night Dinner.
Saying it was better then last year's festival of shite isn't exactly a badge of honour.