Most depressing stand-up tropes. Page 2

Whacky comics. Hey I'm a banana, antelope, neeuurrgggh! (gurns at audience and waggles bum) my mum was a mince pie.
Wibble.

F**k off you c**t and tell some jokes.

Excessively cheery we're all girls together comics.

Hey who here menustrates? Come on fellas every one menustrates! Don't you hate finding rabbit poo in your maltesers? Because you're cuddling mr snuggles whilst eating a bag of maltesers because you're boyfriend called you fat and then you had to have a big cry. Any one here menustrate? I'm mad me!

Hypnotically dull comics who robotically tell one joke after another.

knock knock whos there

the reason the chicken crossed the road

to talk to a doctor about why it thought it was a pair of curtains

and if it didn't pull its self together it could see who was knocking on its door

Quote: sootyj @ September 8 2012, 4:11 PM BST

Whacky comics. Hey I'm a banana, antelope, neeuurrgggh! (gurns at audience and waggles bum) my mum was a mince pie.
Wibble.

F**k off you c**t and tell some jokes.

Excessively cheery we're all girls together comics.

Hey who here menustrates? Come on fellas every one menustrates! Don't you hate finding rabbit poo in your maltesers? Because you're cuddling mr snuggles whilst eating a bag of maltesers because you're boyfriend called you fat and then you had to have a big cry. Any one here menustrate? I'm mad me!

View original

You should do this in your act.

Quote: sootyj @ September 8 2012, 4:11 PM BST

Hypnotically dull comics who robotically tell one joke after another.

knock knock whos there

View original

Jimmy Carr?

Quote: Joyce @ September 8 2012, 12:21 PM BST

I actually hate it when comedians make a 'funny' observation about life and then ask the audience, 'I mean...what's all that about eh?'. I don't know!! Why don't YOU tell us in a FUNNY way so we can feel like we haven't wasted our money!!

View original

This is a brilliant spoof of those sort of observational comedians...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CiajbgY6ofU

When stand up has started having stand ups doing spoofs of stand ups then surely it's time to fall over. Oh well, if it keeps some people occupied then I suppose why not.

Quote: Alfred J Kipper @ September 9 2012, 9:50 AM BST

When stand up has started having stand ups doing spoofs of stand ups then surely it's time to fall over. Oh well, if it keeps some people occupied then I suppose why not.

View original

Yeah cos the film industry died the moment they first did a spoof movie...

Quote: Tony Cowards @ September 9 2012, 9:37 AM BST

This is a brilliant spoof of those sort of observational comedians...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CiajbgY6ofU

View original

Very good.

"The Olympics are going to be rubbish, aren't they?"

7 years of that cobblers. Yes, Andy Parsons I'm looking at you (amongst many, many others).

If you're looking at Andy Parsons you must be leaning at a 30 degree angle.

Anyone remember <insert some sweet/TV show/band/shop from the 1970s>?

All comedy is hackneyed if you are going to put the effort into analysing it. And if you do put the effort into analysing it you risk being as superior and unfunny as Stewart Lee.

Any comedian who tries to 'win over' the trendy lefty crowd straight away with anti-Tory or anti-American comments.

Any male comedian who runs his own gender down just to appear right on and in the desparate hope that women will like him.

Ethnic comics peforming in front of an all white crowd saying how racist white people are.

Overtly camp gay comedians - we get it, you're gay, it was the first words out of your gay mouth when you started your act, there's no need for the full Julian Clary.

Anyone who brings a guitar on stage.

Quote: sootyj @ September 8 2012, 4:11 PM BST

Whacky comics. Hey I'm a banana, antelope, neeuurrgggh! (gurns at audience and waggles bum) my mum was a mince pie.
Wibble.

F**k off you c**t and tell some jokes.

Excessively cheery we're all girls together comics.

Hey who here menustrates? Come on fellas every one menustrates! Don't you hate finding rabbit poo in your maltesers? Because you're cuddling mr snuggles whilst eating a bag of maltesers because you're boyfriend called you fat and then you had to have a big cry. Any one here menustrate? I'm mad me!

Hypnotically dull comics who robotically tell one joke after another.

knock knock whos there

the reason the chicken crossed the road

to talk to a doctor about why it thought it was a pair of curtains

and if it didn't pull its self together it could see who was knocking on its door

View original

Haha went to 'like' this but realised I'm not on facebook.
I always loved Stewart Lee's impression of a bad observational comedian on 41st stand up "How old's yours, 5? Mines 11. It's the SAME. It's the SAME."

Oh, anyone who uses the following words:

badger (the animal, in some kerrrazy context)
jizz
boobs
random (as in, I'm so random!)

Dated topical comics

You know who's more brain dead than bush?

Ronnie regan because he is dead

Ban cruise! Them grEenham women can cover my deadly weapon with fluida

Except the lesbians because I respect them innit

I always found Russel Kane exorcising his demons relating to his father just plain uncomfortable to watch...

He sounded like a bastard...

Quote: Lee Henman @ September 8 2012, 12:24 PM BST

'Edgy' comedians who use the shock value of rape and child abuse gags to get a laugh.
"My village is holding an incest competition. I've entered my niece."

Yawn.

View original

I actually thought that was quite funny.

I've seen your niece, and she's a right little minger.