Blackin up for the BBC

See what you think. Thanks.

BLACKIN’ UP FOR THE BBC
INT. DAY. AN INTERVIEW ROOM IN THE BBC TELEVISION CENTRE.

A YOUNG, SMARTLY DRESSED BLACK, MALE INTERVIEWEE SHAKES HANDS WITH A MIDDLE AGED WHITE INTERVIEWER.

Interviewer:
Please sit down, Mr. Stevens. Now, you know that we are looking to recruit new staff in youth orientated broadcasting.

Interviewee:
Yes, I read in the Guardian that there were jobs at 1 Extra, CBBC and Radio 1.

interviewer:
That’s right, now what experience do you have in those areas?

interviewee:
Well, I used to run the student radio station at Durham Uni, I’ve edited an online magazine about urban music and I’m currently running a creative arts project where I live.

Interviewer:
Nice – so, you deal with deprived kids escaping gun crime by rapping and stuff?

Interviewee:
No, it’s in Hampstead – usually gifted young musicians.

Interviewer:
Yeah whatever. Now, can you say this: “Bee bee ssseeeee dat coo dat yu kayy”?
Interviewee:
What?

Interviewer:
say, “it’s goin’ down lak dees, breakin’ it down lak dat ya get me?”

THE INTERVIEWER STARTS MOVING HIS HANDS LIKE GOLDIE LOOKIN’ CHAIN.

Interviewer:
Can you grow dreadlocks? We need you to look and sound more…

Interviewee:
Black?

Interviewer:
Er –

Interviewee:
You want me to ‘black up’?

Interviewer:
As a public service broadcaster we need to reflect the cultural diversity of the nation.

interviewee:
Which means you could employ black presenters who don’t talk like Frank Spencer?

The phone rings.
Interviewer:

Hi, yes.. he’s good but not ‘urban’ enough. No.. he doesn’t want to be blacked up…. OK, I’ll ask him.. you’re not gay, are you?

Interviewee:
Yes, I am.

Interviewer:
Would you be prepared to go to BBC ‘Camp camp’?

Interviewee:
Maybe.

Interviewer:
The job’s yours!

THEY SHAKE HANDS.
CUT

Nice sketch but i would shake it up at the end

Interviewer:
Would you be prepared to go to BBC ‘Camp camp’?

Interviewee:
Would I?!?

Interviewer:
The job’s yours!

THEY SHAKE HANDS.
CUT

Hi Fred

It's a nice idea but I think you could make it a lot funnier. It's kind of at that 'nice' level of humour where you smile to yourself but could do with a bigger laugh or two within.

Don't give up with it as it's got potential.

Dan

I like the themes that laugh at these people who think they have a connection with yoof culture. Particularly establishments like the Beeb. Keep going.

Quote: ajp29 @ February 16, 2007, 10:41 PM

Nice sketch but i would shake it up at the end

View original

I liked this skecth a lot and although it builds quite nicely, I also felt the ending needed something more but even so, it was a pleasure to read.

i'VE CHANGED THE ENDING NOW. See what you think. Thanks.

BLACKIN’ UP FOR THE BBC
INT. DAY. AN INTERVIEW ROOM IN THE BBC TELEVISION CENTRE.

A YOUNG, SMARTLY DRESSED BLACK, MALE INTERVIEWEE SHAKES HANDS WITH A MIDDLE AGED WHITE INTERVIEWER.

Interviewer:
Please sit down, Mr. Stevens. Now, you know that we are looking to recruit new staff in youth orientated broadcasting.

Interviewee:
Yes, I read in the Guardian that there were jobs at 1 Extra, CBBC and Radio 1.

interviewer:
That’s right, now what experience do you have in those areas?

interviewee:
Well, I used to run the student radio station at Durham Uni, I’ve edited an online magazine about urban music and I’m currently running a creative arts project where I live.

Interviewer:
Nice – so, you deal with deprived kids escaping gun crime by rapping and stuff?

Interviewee:
No, it’s in Hampstead – usually gifted young musicians.

Interviewer:
Yeah whatever. Now, can you say this: “Bee bee ssseeeee dat coo dat yu kayy”?
Interviewee:
What?

Interviewer:
say, “it’s goin’ down lak dees, breakin’ it down lak dat ya get me?”

THE INTERVIEWER STARTS MOVING HIS HANDS LIKE GOLDIE LOOKIN’ CHAIN.

Interviewer:
Can you grow dreadlocks? We need you to look and sound more…

Interviewee:
Black?

Interviewer:
Er –

Interviewee:
You want me to ‘black up’?

Interviewer:
As a public service broadcaster we need to reflect the cultural diversity of the nation.

interviewee:
Which means you could employ black presenters who don’t talk like Frank Spencer?

The phone rings.
Interviewer:

Hi, yes.. he’s good but not ‘urban’ enough. No.. he doesn’t want to be blacked up…. OK, I’ll ask him.. you’re not gay, are you?

Interviewee:
Yes, I am.

Interviewer:
Would you be prepared to go to BBC ‘Camp camp’?

Interviewee:
Maybe.

Interviewer:
Great - there's a vacancy for a gay black TV chef.

Interviewee:
Isn't there already Ainsley Harriot?

Interviewer:
He's not gay.

Interviewee:
Now you really are taking the piss. I'm off.

HE STORMS OFF.

CUT

I like this but I think you have to be careful with using well known people, in terms of what you say about them. I suspect that the Ainsley Harriot bit would be the first thing a broadcaster or production company would cut from the sketch and ask the writer to replace it with something else.

I like the whole idea of white middle class beeb types thinking they're 'on the ball' with culture (black or white, youth or older) and the ridiculous things interviewers ask. So as a situation for a skeych it's top notch.

Good advice, Flicker. So Now I've alluded to a celeb in a Popbitch style.

BLACKIN’ UP FOR THE BBC
INT. DAY. AN INTERVIEW ROOM IN THE BBC TELEVISION CENTRE.

A YOUNG, SMARTLY DRESSED BLACK, MALE INTERVIEWEE SHAKES HANDS WITH A MIDDLE AGED WHITE INTERVIEWER.

Interviewer:
Please sit down, Mr. Stevens. Now, you know that we are looking to recruit new staff in youth orientated broadcasting.

Interviewee:
Yes, I read in the Guardian that there were jobs at 1 Extra, CBBC and Radio 1.

interviewer:
That’s right, now what experience do you have in those areas?

interviewee:
Well, I used to run the student radio station at Durham Uni, I’ve edited an online magazine about urban music and I’m currently running a creative arts project where I live.

Interviewer:
Nice – so, you deal with deprived kids escaping gun crime by rapping and stuff?

Interviewee:
No, it’s in Hampstead – usually gifted young musicians.

Interviewer:
Yeah whatever. Now, can you say this: “Bee bee ssseeeee dat coo dat yu kayy”?
Interviewee:
What?

Interviewer:
say, “it’s goin’ down lak dees, breakin’ it down lak dat ya get me?”

THE INTERVIEWER STARTS MOVING HIS HANDS LIKE GOLDIE LOOKIN’ CHAIN.

Interviewer:
Can you grow dreadlocks? We need you to look and sound more…

Interviewee:
Black?

Interviewer:
Er –

Interviewee:
You want me to ‘black up’?

Interviewer:
As a public service broadcaster we need to reflect the cultural diversity of the nation.

interviewee:
Which means you could employ black presenters who don’t talk like Frank Spencer?

The phone rings.
Interviewer:

Hi, yes.. he’s good but not ‘urban’ enough. No.. he doesn’t want to be blacked up…. OK, I’ll ask him.. you’re not gay, are you?

Interviewee:
Yes, I am.

Interviewer:
Would you be prepared to go to BBC ‘Camp camp’?

Interviewee:
Maybe.

Interviewer:
Great - there's a vacancy for a gay black TV chef.

Interviewee:
Isn't there already one?

Interviewer:
He's not gay.

Interviewee:
Now you really are taking the piss. I'm off.

HE STORMS OFF.

CUT

The problem I've still got with this sketch is the ending. I think it needs to be something more than an angry exit to wrap the whole thing up or else it just comes over as a lazy. I realise this is not what you've intended but, nevertheless, that's the feeling I get. Sorry.

Fair comment, Baumski. I'll go back to it. I was trying to end it with a 'gag' but I agree the funniest sketches don't end that way - they usually end with something unexpected. Good feedyback.

Hows about

Interviewee
Is this positive discrimination

Interviewer
No, unless you are HIV positive

Interviewee
No

Interviwer
Could you be by Monday?