British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 938

Is it his man milk?

I hope not. Although I don't drink it anyway, so who cares!

I have Lactofree milk with a picture of a cow on the front. It's for special people.

Where does 'lactofree' come from? a cow?

Yep! Then they take the bad bits out.

Why are we giving money to the dairy farmers again? Don't they get loads of dosh from the Government and the EU?

*I don't drink tea or coffee, so you could put an extra £1 on the stuff and it wouldn't bother me*

Don't you eat cereal?

Quote: zooo @ July 20 2012, 12:22 AM BST

Yep! Then they take the bad bits out.

It's an old question but who the fudge was the first person to try cows milk?

Quote: zooo @ July 20 2012, 12:27 AM BST

Don't you eat cereal?

Milk is in loads of things as an ingredient. So it's pretty unavoidable.

Quote: zooo @ July 20 2012, 12:27 AM BST

Don't you eat cereal?

Very rarely. In fact, I normally don't have breakfast.

Quote: Lee @ July 20 2012, 12:29 AM BST

Milk is in loads of things as an ingredient. So it's pretty unavoidable.

Yeah, but I don't have to give the farmers an extra 10p for my milk choccy biccies.

Quote: Lee @ July 20 2012, 12:29 AM BST

Milk is in loads of things as an ingredient. So it's pretty unavoidable.

So I have found!

Quote: zooo @ July 20 2012, 12:33 AM BST

So I have found!

You are so intolerant zooo - you big farty bot-bot. ;)

Ha, I just get an extremely painful tummyache.

That Leonard on Big Bang Theory has done nothing for the reputation of us Lactose intolerants.

Quote: zooo @ July 20 2012, 12:33 AM BST

So I have found!

I used to get bad stomach pains from eating cereal (something that consumes lots of milk) so I started using a milk alternative and the pains stopped. But I carried on eating it as an ingredient and even in my tea.

Do you have to have everything lactose free? Does small traces of milk, say in chocolate affect you?

Apparently dark chocolate is okay for some people, and small amounts of certain cheeses. But everyone is different, and it's impossible for me to experiment with different things and amounts, because it's just not worth getting a 24 hour agonising pain. So I just avoid it all.
(Unless I've had one of my magic pills that means I can eat anything. Which I pretty much take every day.)

Quote: zooo @ July 20 2012, 12:36 AM BST

That Leonard on Big Bang Theory has done nothing for the reputation of us Lactose intolerants.

Yep, he is the most famous milk adverse person I know after Marc Almond.

Quote: zooo @ July 20 2012, 12:48 AM BST

Apparently dark chocolate is okay for some people, and small amounts of certain cheeses. But everyone is different, and it's impossible for me to experiment with different things and amounts, because it's just not worth getting a 24 hour agonising pain. So I just avoid it all.
(Unless I've had one of my magic pills that means I can eat anything. Which I pretty much take every day.)

Is it like indigestion? Because that's what it felt like for me. I've never had it diagnosed because it's not really a big deal and haven't experienced it for years anyway.

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