ta muchly,
you gonna let me have the edit I just did too?
KI: One Liners Page 6
Thanks everyone for all the contributions, there's a lot of good stuff here. We'll take a look at them and let you know how it goes.
Remember, if you want to be credited with something other than your BCG profile name, you'll have to let someone know what your real name is. I know many of you have already contacted lippyalison with those details, but if you've submitted some one-liners and haven't done that, then drop me a PM and let me know your preferred name should we need to credit you.
Thanks again,
Jamie
Quote: Bomsh @ June 14 2012, 5:10 PM BSTta muchly,
you gonna let me have the edit I just did too?
Yep!
Missed the deadline but anyway...
PERSON: I don't understand why People are accusing Cameron of being too close to the Murdoch press when it's clear most of his policies are written by the Daily Mail.
1
Today. My girlfriend asked me to get a constructive hobby. She came home to find me playing with lego.
2
In an attempt to encourage flossing. I bought some which was flavoured. Tasted great but messy and didn't work.
It's a very misleading name you know, Candy Floss.
3
Right, that's done. Now for the left.
4
My local pub at 9am this morning was full of blokes drinking pints. How disgraceful is that? How did I know? I sat watching them with my vodka & coke.
5
I love my local bookshop.
If I see a book I like, I buy it there and then
cheaper on my iPhone Amazon app
6
Stupid jeans not fitting me anymore. Damn you six pack, why did you have to grow bigger?
7
Even if you're buying petrol by card. I guarantee, buying £x and a penny will still aggravate you
8
Last week I won a £500 Primark shopping spree.
I came back with 134 shirts, 14 pairs of trousers and 65 pairs of socks.
9
Today I asked my barber to style my hair like a birds nest.
If that doesn't attract the birds then nothing will.
10
"a man walks into a bar" possibly the worst high jump commentary I've ever heard.
11
Dating advice: never try pull anyone who's German. I did once. I asked for her name, would she like a drink, dance etc. she kept on shouting the number nine at me. Stupid woman!
12
There's a brilliant new book out from today called 7 days. In fact it's so good. WH Smiths have made it their "book of the week"
Quote: Tony Cowards @ June 11 2012, 12:15 PM BSTMaybe David and Samantha Cameron didn't have enough money to pay and were leaving their daughter at the pub as collateral?
Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration, so good news for Tony award winning James Corden, he's only 1% away.
I guess with Ridley Scott films, you're either Prometheus or Antimetheus.
I'm so out of touch with youth culture, I thought Peppa Pig was a cooking instruction.
What's a Grecian Urn? Nowhere near enough to secure extra EU bailout funding from France and Germany.
In Sweden the new Marvel film is called "Avengers Self-Assemble".
Michel Platini suggests referees book players at Euro 2012 if they walk off the pitch after being racially abused? But how else are they supposed to get away from John Terry?
Is the modern equivalent of Nazi book burning is deleting files from your Kindle?
I seem to have a credit for this, can anyone who's listened to it let me know which line made it in?
Quote: Kev Funny @ June 24 2012, 9:11 AM BST10
"a man walks into a bar" possibly the worst high jump commentary I've ever heard.
The others did nothing for me, but I do like this one, it's rather clever. However, it's not the commentary that was bad, surely, but the jump itself.
You might want to post any other gags in a new thread, as this was for a project called Kirin Island.
Quote: Tony Cowards @ June 28 2012, 12:44 AM BSTI seem to have a credit for this, can anyone who's listened to it let me know which line made it in?
If you can't be bothered to listen then we can't be bothered to tell you
To be honest I can't remember any of those.
Did you submit any others?
The pole vault bar gag is good, if a little awkwardly worded
Quote: Steve Sunshine @ June 28 2012, 10:30 AM BSTIf you can't be bothered to listen then we can't be bothered to tell you
To be honest I can't remember any of those.
Did you submit any others?
I have actually listened to it, although I must admit I was multi-tasking and writing at the same time so I probably missed it.
Don't think I submitted any other lines but I'll have a look.
Tony - I remember seeing your name on the board - sure you didn't send others?
Quote: Tony Cowards @ June 13 2012, 11:08 AM BSTNot sure about Danny Boyle's idea of having a trapped rock climber hack off his own arm at the opening ceremony for the Paralympics.
This?
You know you're getting old when you can't even remember what you've submitted.
It was edited as I recall, so no mention of the paralympics. Might be wrong.
Quote: Tony Cowards @ June 13 2012, 11:08 AM BSTNot sure about Danny Boyle's idea of having a trapped rock climber hack off his own arm at the opening ceremony for the Paralympics.
That sounds close, I remember a line about a hacked off arm.
Tony,
We used the Avengers Self Assemble line in a sketch. I can't recall if it made the final edit - and we recorded the credits before the final iTunes edit so it is possible that it's not there now. However it was recorded - and would have featured in the Brooklands Radio broadcast so you are rightly credited.
As it happens there is reference to Danny Boyle and sawing off arms in the opening intro that Big Jack delivers. That similar line was submitted by someone else. You are both credited so all bases covered.
Hope that helps
Alison
Quote: LippyAlison @ June 28 2012, 8:16 PM BSTTony,
We used the Avengers Self Assemble line in a sketch. I can't recall if it made the final edit - and we recorded the credits before the final iTunes edit so it is possible that it's not there now. However it was recorded - and would have featured in the Brooklands Radio broadcast so you are rightly credited.
As it happens there is reference to Danny Boyle and sawing off arms in the opening intro that Big Jack delivers. That similar line was submitted by someone else. You are both credited so all bases covered.
Hope that helps
Alison
Thanks Alison, much appreciated.