Will Cam
Thursday 7th June 2012 11:34pm
8,180 posts
Quote: sootyj @ June 6 2012, 11:48 AM BST
OUR WILL CAM IS STANDING IN THE FRONT DOOR OF HIS HOUSE LOOKING SHAME FACED BESIDES HIM STANDS A CROSS LOOKING POLICE OFFICER INFRONT STANDS MRS OUR WILL CAM WITH ROLLERS IN HER HAIR AND A ROLLING PIN
OUR WILL CAM HAS A BOOT SHAPED MARK IN THE BACK OF HIS TROUSER, A FLATTENED NOSE AND A TRUNCHEON SHAPED DENT IN HIS FLAT CAP
POLICE OFFICER
Is this your husband mam?
MRS OUR WILL CAM
Aye, he looks a bit battered. But that's our layabout, work shy husband whats he been doing now?
POLICE OFFICER
Playing pooh sticks the young scally wag.
MRS OUR WILL CAM
And you gave thou nincompoop a shoeing for that?
POLICE OFFICER
He did a 1000 plops off bridge in t' river. He was sticking little union jacks in them with cocktail sticks an all.
OUR WILL CAM
I only wanted to see t' flottila. But after Jarrow Marches us shiftless Northern unemployed aren't allowed down south. So I were making a pootilla.
POLICE OFFICER
And the wicked crime of dogicide.
POLICE OFFICER HANDS OUR WILL CAM'S WIFE A BLOODIED POTATO SACK SHE LOOKS INSIDE AND SHRIEKS.
OUR WILL CAM'S WIFE
Eeee our Sootyj! Ee's been hoofed to death. Why our will Cam?
OUR WILL CAM
Eee were being reet unpatriotic. I asked how our lovely queen were looking and e said "Rough!"
POLICE OFFICER
Can I leave this reprobate with you mam?
OUR WILL CAM'S WIFE
I think you rightly can! He's due for his OBE.
OUR WILL CAM
Eee grand I knew me patriotism would pay off.
OUR WILL CAM'S WIFE
One bent ear!
OUR WILL CAM'S WIFE DRAGS HIM IN BY ONE EAR
OUR WILL CAM
Owww turned out shite again!
Cheers fr the bump Sootyj, I had missed this one. Another beaut