British Comedy Guide

Things that piss you off Page 957

Quote: TopBanana @ May 26 2012, 6:41 PM BST

Swearing seems to be ok (not in thread titles) but Aaron will be on your ass if you have poor grammar.

Which you don't.

Banana Boy: Happy to Help.

:)

My grammar's beautiful. I hate bananas.
^ a few more facts there.
Thanks TB.

:D Good morning! No birds annoying me, however am awaiting the 'brats' to be out soon with their water-pistols' that Mummy/daddy have provided so they get peace and quiet and the rest of us have to en-bloody-dure.

Screaming of 6 girls is formidable- need a holiday.

In my desperate bid to fit in with the rest of society - because conformity equals happiness - I sat out in the sun yesterday in a futile attempt at a tan.

But being that my skin is usually the colour of an albino Irish ghost fish, I have gone from wall paper paste to medium rare steak. My red face makes me look like an angry alcoholic - I know I'm an angry alcoholic - but I don't want to sign post it to complete strangers.

Still, I have a colour even if it's not the one that's on the holiday brochures.

Tanning is overrated and can lead to skin nasties. Much better to be pale and pasty.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ May 27 2012, 3:33 PM BST

In my desperate bid to fit in with the rest of society - because conformity equals happiness - I sat out in the sun yesterday in a futile attempt at a tan.

But being that my skin is usually the colour of an albino Irish ghost fish, I have gone from wall paper paste to medium rare steak. My red face makes me look like an angry alcoholic - I know I'm an angry alcoholic - but I don't want to sign post it to complete strangers.

Still, I have a colour even if it's not the one that's on the holiday brochures.

Hey Big Chief Watta Homa, fancy some firewater?

Dances with Wolves sucked!

Yes, you numpty - I hope you wore suntan lotion.

Quote: zooo @ May 27 2012, 3:41 PM BST

Yes, you numpty - I hope you wore suntan lotion.

Never!

I did that last year and got no tan whatsover, so this time round I let the sun caress my naked skin (shiver) and now look carcinogen-tastic!

Remember, it's what's on the outside that counts.

Quote: sootyj @ May 27 2012, 3:41 PM BST

Hey Big Chief Watta Homa, fancy some firewater?

Thank you Sumo Tabby, a cold glass of firewater sounds mighty tasty.

How many beads for Hayling Island ya savage?

Quote: sootyj @ May 27 2012, 4:19 PM BST

How many beads for Hayling Island ya savage?

Oh no, the last time I accepted beads from you they still had the Ann Summers label on them - and you didn't clean them.

Sick

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ May 27 2012, 4:56 PM BST

Oh no, the last time I accepted beads from you they still had the Ann Summers label on them - and you didn't clean them.

Sick

Yesthat's why I was trying to get money back on them.

You run the worst carboot stall I've ever seen.

Your plugs don't fit any known plughole.

Quote: sootyj @ May 27 2012, 5:04 PM BST

Your plugs don't fit any known plughole.

Then you're going to be mightily disappointed when those eggs I sold you don't hatch.

EDIT: How long have you been sitting on them again?

I dunno you mama won't hand them over

Selfish so and so she's got 2 dozen.

Every year I watch the BAFTAs, and every year they remind me that they are a load of old shit who give out prizes to anyone.

Argh.

Mrs Brown's Boys indeed. Pah.

Quote: zooo @ May 27 2012, 8:18 PM BST

Every year I watch the BAFTAs, and every year they remind me that they are a load of old shit who give out prizes to anyone.

Argh.

Mrs Brown's Boys indeed. Pah.

I'm quite pleased for them. I don't particularly like MBB, but I'm sick of people complaining about it. Using one programme as a byword for what is basically trying to seem superior gets on my nerves a lot, so if them winning annoys all those people I'm very much in favour.

I wouldn't have minded so much if the awesome and brilliant Rev hadn't also been nominated!

Even allowing for peoples' obvious different tastes, there is no way on earth that MBB is better than Rev. (Or Fresh Meat).

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