Quote: billwill @ April 15 2012, 12:00 AM BSTI used to be a good shot with one of these:
but I'm not steady enough nowadays.
Those were good rifles that put a lot of bad guys in their graves.
I think that kids should be taught to shoot safely and accurately once they are about 10 or so. I know the Boy Scouts used to do such training but I don't know if it's still done.
Quote: zooo @ April 15 2012, 12:01 AM BSTIs that how you got the pigskin hat?
Nah.. I used to have a nice fedora hat, can't remember where I got that one, but one day I left it on a 134 bus. Despite chasing it to the terminus, I couldn't quite tell which 134 it was and the hat was never handed in to lost property.
So shortly afterwards I went hunting in the classic clothes stalls in Camden Horse Market and that's where I found the pigskin hat.
Quote: billwill @ April 15 2012, 12:10 AM BSTNah.. I used to have a nice fedora hat, can't remember where I got that one, but one day I left it on a 134 bus. Despite chasing it to the terminus, I couldn't quite tell which 134 it was and the hat was never handed in to lost property.
Ooh, those dirty hat stealers. 
15 minutes ago I put a frozen pizza in the oven because I was starving. I just got up to run to a Mexican fast food joint for dinner and happened to see the lighted oven when I picked up my keys.
Getting old sucks.
Quote: DaButt @ April 15 2012, 1:02 AM BST15 minutes ago I put a frozen pizza in the oven because I was starving. I just got up to run to a Mexican fast food joint for dinner and happened to see the lighted oven when I picked up my keys.
Getting old sucks.
Not sure it's an age thing. I went to the shops the other day to get something specific and in the 15 mins it took to get from home to the shop forgot what I'd gone out for. It took me 30 mins to remember what it was I needed.
Currently locked out the house and sat in my car amidst torrential rain.
Quote: Ben @ April 15 2012, 3:49 PM BSTCurrently locked out the house and sat in my car amidst torrential rain.
There's not a house key on the keychain you used to unlock the car? 
The answer is clear here. Drive the car through the door.
Quote: DaButt @ April 15 2012, 3:54 PM BSTThere's not a house key on the keychain you used to unlock the car?
The house door is double locked and - for reasons too boring to go into - I only have one of the keys on my keychain at present. Am back in the house now as my GF is back. Phew!
Sorting through some papers and discovered my London Mayor voting form thingy. Don't normally vote for anyone, but I like Boris, so will put a big tick in his box.
UKIP will get my second preference of course.
Quote: Marc P @ April 14 2012, 10:14 PM BSTRwayne might disagree but I do know everything about everything!
Bertie:
You bally well are informed Jeeves - do you know know everything?
Jeeves:
I really don't know, sir.
I am off to Newcastle this weekend, I need a few tips where to visit/drink from dear Nat Wicks? where is she?... Hello 
I had a great night out in Newcastle few years back, went to a bar and met someone dressed exactly like myself. Got offered a job in an accountants, lost the people I was with found them 3 bars later and fell asleep in the garage. When we were sneaking back in the house.
I thought my computer was infected with a virus as every time I went to email it made a loud meow.
Looked out of my window and saw it was 2 very, fat and spoiled cats fighting. More by half arsedly lumbering upto each other and go meowing before collapsing from the effort.
Lazy fat cat bastards.
Quote: sootyj @ April 16 2012, 1:46 PM BSTLazy fat cat bastards.
Hey up wannabe comedians, save time and money with my new DVD - The Sootyj Guide to Joke Crafting. In this handy tutorial, I will teach you, Bob Nobody, how to make funnies as good as the legendary sootyj.
Step 1. - Choose a well know expression and make it your punchline
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Here's one I made earlier -
I was going to my local whore house but had to stand in line behind Alistair Cook, Robin Cook, Peter Cook and Captain James Cook. By the time I got to see my favourite prostitute her room smelled disgusting. You could say that too many Cooks spoiled the brothel.
These and many more can be had for the bargain price of 15 Canadian Dollars, 3 litres of supermarket cider or a quick go on your Mum. Order now!
