British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 711

Quote: DaButt @ March 21 2012, 6:24 PM GMT

All the shooter has to do is prove that he acted in self-defence. If any of the following are also factual, then the shooting was justified and legal:

I'd say "legally justified" rather than "justified and legal", and that's only because Florida's shoot-whoever-the-f**k-you-want law is utterly insane.

If I ever get the urge to kill somebody, all I'm going to have to do is:

a) move to Florida

b) buy a gun

c) find somebody who's breaking the law, eg littering

d) harass them until they make a move on me

e) shoot them in the head

f) masturbate into Old Glory

Quote: Kevin Murphy @ March 21 2012, 5:43 PM GMT

He patently wasn't defending himself, given that he is on record as saying he was actually *following* the poor kid.

He was following a trespasser -- not a "poor kid" -- and it was his job to deter such activity. Neither of us knows what took place while they struggled. If the man said he feared for his life and there is no evidence to the contrary, then his claim of self-defence can't be ignored and he won't be arrested.

Quote: Kevin Murphy @ March 21 2012, 6:31 PM GMT

Florida's shoot-whoever-the-f**k-you-want law is utterly insane.

You're insane if you think that's how the law works. ;)

Quote: Kevin Murphy @ March 21 2012, 6:31 PM GMT

I'd say "legally justified" rather than "justified and legal", and that's only because Florida's shoot-whoever-the-f**k-you-want law is utterly insane.

If I ever get the urge to kill somebody, all I'm going to have to do is:

a) move to Florida

b) buy a gun

c) find somebody who's breaking the law, eg littering

d) harass them until they make a move on me

e) shoot them in the head

f) masturbate into Old Glory

F**k it I'm leaving a Plasma TV box outside my front door, leave door on latch.

Wait for someone to try and enter the door.

Then Kapow!

nb is there an additional punishment for masturbating over their steaming carcas?

I think it would add a touch of class.

Quote: DaButt @ March 21 2012, 6:33 PM GMT

He was following a trespasser -- not a "poor kid" -- and it was his job to deter such activity.

The kid's dead. I think "poor kid" is a pretty accurate description.

The shooter's actual "job" is still the subject of speculation as I understand it. It's not clear from the reports whether he was even an official Neighborhood Watch -- and if he was he shouldn't have been carrying a piece -- and the cops say he was out on a personal errand when he decided to start following the victim.

Quote: Kevin Murphy @ March 21 2012, 6:44 PM GMT

The shooter's actual "job" is still the subject of speculation as I understand it. It's not clear from the reports whether he was even an official Neighborhood Watch -- and if he was he shouldn't have been carrying a piece -- and the cops say he was out on a personal errand when he decided to start following the victim.

None of that really matters. If the man feared for his life and there's no evidence to the contrary, he will not be charged.

It really is the perfect murder.

Quote: Kevin Murphy @ March 21 2012, 7:59 PM GMT

It really is the perfect murder.

It's not a murder if the man was defending himself and so far no evidence to the contrary has emerged.

Lol, of course it hasn't, the only other witness has been murdered. Sorry, killed in a perfectly innocent manner. ;)

The average person isn't a murderer. Absent witnesses, the authorities will have to prove that the shooter was the type of person who would murder someone for the hell of it. As it stands, he was a member of the community patrol who called the police to report a crime in progress. The average murderer doesn't have the police on the line while he murders people.

If I shoot an intruder in my home without witnesses, perhaps I invited him in for tea and crumpets before I killed him in cold blood. The cops are going to investigate my background, question me repeatedly to see if my story changes and then they're going to let me off the hook because the average person isn't a cold-blooded murderer.

Well that sounds like a good policy.

Quote: Kevin Murphy @ March 21 2012, 5:43 PM GMT

I must say, I'm surprised by the amount of support for the killer on this thread, even from Carpark.

I love the way people are throwing around the words 'killer' and 'murderer' to someone who has been proven innocent by the police. This is all based on some bullshit reporting by the media and once again, anything to do with legally owned firearms becomes a British liberal bleeding heart emotional shitfest.

Now, whether there is questionable motive surrounding the shooting or not is one thing, but to announce this as some sort of child killing racial hate crime is ignorance beyond belief.

If a 17 black dude shoots a white couple dead during a mugging, would you keep using the words 'poor kid'? I highly doubt it. Take a step back, have a deep breath and look at the situation for what it was. Poor judgement on the side of both parties leading to a tragic shooting.

I think the key words here are 'gated community'.

If I chose to move to a gated community I would expect some level of security and safety, not to see every mother fecker who fancied taking a short cut or whatever wandering around outside my door uninvited.

If you climb the fence and walk along a railway track odds are you're going to get hit by a train.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ March 21 2012, 9:13 PM GMT

I love the way people are throwing around the words 'killer' and 'murderer' to someone who has been proven innocent by the police.

He's still a killer. That's factual.

Quote: zooo @ March 21 2012, 9:15 PM GMT

He's still a killer. That's factual.

So are the brave men and women who fought in World War 2 defending Britain from the Nazis then.

Quote: Harridan @ March 21 2012, 8:40 PM GMT

Well that sounds like a good policy.

Requiring evidence before convicting someone of a crime? Yeah, it works pretty well.

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