NJ Jordan Pledge

This story still seemed to have legs so I gave it a try....
Alison.

INTRO:In the on-going story to deport radical hate cleric, Abu Qatada, back to his home country of Katie Price. The Home Secretary herself is paying a visit to the capital Amman to try to strike a deal.

GRAMS:ARABIC MUSIC

MAY:Now Your Excellency, about Mr Qatada. Can we please come to some arrangement.

JORDANIAN:Yes of course we can. What arrangement would you like to come to?

MAY:Well, first of all we need an assurance that he will not be tortured.

JORDANIANf course. We will not torture Mr Qatada....

MAY:Excellent.

JORDANIAN: ...between the hours of 2am and 8am when our chief torturer is off duty.

MAY:No. No. You don't understand. That's not what I need to hear.

JORDANIANh. You want to know more details about how we will torture Mr Qatada?

MAY:No. I don't want to hear about you torturing Mr Qatada at all.

JORDANIAN:Then why did you ask me about it?

MAY:I'm hoping to hear that you will not be torturing Mr Qatada so that the ECHR will let us send him home to you. So will you be?

JORDANIAN:Maybe. Maybe not.

MAY:Well we'd rather you didn't.

JORDANIANuit yourself. So I suppose I could give you this assurance you are so keen on. And it might speed things up if you had any... let's say Olympic tickets going spare.

MAY:Ah that might be a problem. We are rather over-subscribed already.

JORDANIANh that is a pity. But I suppose we'll be far too busy extracting Mr Qatada's finger nails to have time to visit.

MAYK. OK. I think I might be able to lay my hands on some 2nd round ladies football tickets at Craven Cottage.

JORDANIAN:That is excellent. My favourite sport.

F/XCRIBBLES OF PEN ON PAPER.

JORDANIAN (CONT): Here is your assurance.

MAY:Thank you very much. Why have you written it on Lib Dem note paper?

JORDANIAN:I'm sorry. I thought it was one of those types of pledges you wanted.

MAY:Ah yes. Well done. Nice doing business with you.

Quote: lippy @ March 9 2012, 11:49 PM GMT

This story still seemed to have legs so I gave it a try....

INTRO:In the on-going story to deport radical hate cleric, Abu Qatada, back to his home country of Katie Price.

View original

Nooooo!!!!

Quote: Timbo @ March 10 2012, 10:42 AM GMT

Nooooo!!!!

View original

I was hoping the ban on Jordan/Price mix ups might have ended after ep2. I've really only got myself to blame... But apart from that Mrs Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play?

I like the idea behind the sketch, and the Olympic tickets bit is an interesting twist, but while I get the LibDem empty promise connection it feels as though you are stretching a bit there.

In fairness though I should point out that I know nothing.

Quote: lippy @ March 10 2012, 11:13 AM GMT

I was hoping the ban on Jordan/Price mix ups might have ended after ep2.

View original

If it's an obvious gag in week one, it's obvious gag in week 2 and so on. Once it's been pointed out to you by the producer, avoid it forever.

It's quite a good sketch, though the focus changes so it's kind of like two ideas in one and I'm not sure if that does it any favours.

I like the LibDem-headed notepaper bit though and the Jordanian character came across well.

Dan

Thanks guys for the thoughts. I intended the meander into the Olympics to be a device to change the pace - but possibly could have stuck with the original plot - and the punch line wouldn't have been affected. Thx