I thought this was my strongest sketch this week, although on reflection it probably needed more jokes.
JUSTIN:
David Cameron's adviser is taking a break from Downing Street, and it's easy to understand why. The guy was appreciated about as much as everyone in Girls Aloud who wasn't Cheryl.
STEVE:
David, the word on the street is you're considering hiring Andy Coulsen. It's a bad move; the guy has more skeletons in his closet than a fancy dress shop on the run-up to Halloween.
DAVID:
Nonsense. The man is like Nick Clegg, he's all about the integrity.
STEVE:
There's also talk that you're considering appointing Emma Harrison as a 'back to work tsar'. Something's a bit off there; she's taking home eight million pounds a year.
DAVID:
There's nothing dodgy about that, that's the average wage.
STEVE:
Also, Rebekah Brooks is one of your constituents. You should try and avoid too much contact with her. She's got 'trouble' written all over her.
DAVID:
I'll take your advice on board, but Rupert has the final say on who my friends are.
STEVE:
Fair enough, but if you do decide to befriend her, and I'm sure you'll have the good sense not to...well this is a million to one shot, it's never going to happen, but as she's, how shall I put it, 'friendly' with the police force, if they were ever to give her a horse; whatever you do, and I can't stress this strongly enough, under any circumstances, do not ride that horse.
DAVID:
What am I, an idiot?
STEVE:
I'll answer that when I get back from my break. How long is the average holiday?
DAVID:
About a year isn't it?
STEVE:
See you then.
