Three Drunks in a Chip Shop

Three Drunks In Chip Shop.The title sung the tune of 'Three Coins in a Fountain'

Drunk 1 sings
Fry me to the moon,(Fly Me To The Moon)
Cod and chips and make it soon.

Drunk 2 sings
Fry me a kipper, I fried a kipper over you, (Cry Me A River)
But I’ll have cod and chips too

Drunk 3 sings
He knows all there is to know about the frying game.(The Crying Game)
So I think I’ll have the same, thank-you

Chip Shop Owner sings
It’s my chip shop and I’ll fry if I want to, (I'll Cry If I Want To)

Chip Shop Owner’s Wife sings
That’ll be four quid each
Who’s frying now, (Who's Crying Now)

Good 'un, Jerf

I wish you'd put "To the tune of..." in there though - when I first read it I carried on with Fly Me To the Moon until I realised it wasn't quite right metrically.
Loved the last line.

Very funny, I could have seen the two Ronnies doing this. Lovely bit of humour there.

I think if the sketch was radio or TV, the singing would be self evident, It's not meant as a written joke
The Two Ronnies did lot's 'Minister of Pispronunciation'etc

Quote: Jerf Roberwitz @ January 19, 2008, 3:02 PM

I think if the sketch was radio or TV, the singing would be self evident, It's not meant as a written joke

View original

I realise that, I just meant so us wot are reading it can grasp it straight away. Besides, wouldn't the actors need to know this info?

Anyway, just a small issue - was a nice piece.

Ian W, Sorry to confuse you mate, next time I'll include some sheet music.

Quote: Jerf Roberwitz @ January 19, 2008, 3:44 PM

Ian W, Sorry to confuse you mate, next time I'll include some sheet music.

View original

Prickly today aren't we?

Quote: Jerf Roberwitz @ January 19, 2008, 3:44 PM

Ian W, Sorry to confuse you mate, next time I'll include some sheet music.

View original

That really wasn't necessary though, was it?
I was just trying to offer what I thought might be a helpful suggestion.
Clearly you're not looking for critisism, Jerf, so I will refrain in future.

Wind it in Jerf, please. I've ignored the two other comments you've made today. You post material for crit but then even the mildest comment seems to rankle you.

Ian made a very reasonable comment.

How are we (or the script readers) supposed to magically hit on the same tunes you've thought of? I got the "Fly me to the moon" reference and then assumed they were all to the same tune. As did other readers. I then had to try deciphering the others but gave up.

As a writer, YOU have to do the hard work for the reader, not expect them to turn it into Da Vinci code style detective work.

Jerf, I thought this was pretty good mate.

I was disappointed that you didn't do 'salmon chanted evening' or 'hard of herring' which are two favourite jokes of mine and the missus.

Putting up the sheet music is a very good idea - or at least guitar tabs.

Hi Jerf

This made me laugh too. I got all the musical references so I saw where you were coming from here. But as you say it's a aural sketch rather than a written one.

Nice one

SlagA No comment rankles me, my replies are meant as humourous banter.
If you didn't know the tune, there is no way to desribe it, if you know a way, tell me, You are turning the site into a mutual appreciation society.
It seems you have decided to get rid of me, Don't fanny about mate, do it (I always though there were two of you)
I've had the sack from better dumps than this.

Hi Jerf,

What about

Drunk 1 to tune of Fly me to the moon

Drunk 2 to tune of Cry me a river

Drunk 3 to tune of The Crying game

Shop owner to tune of It's my party....etc etc

I think that's all folks were suggesting and as it's a written piece and nobody is hearing it then it would need that so as all the readers "got it"

Quote: Jerf Roberwitz @ January 19, 2008, 4:48 PM

If you didn't know the tune, there is no way to desribe it,

View original

Its quite simple, and I would have thought obvious and necassary, to mention at the start of each what the lines are sung to the tune of.
Without that you have to guess, even if its simple to work out, you shouldnt have to. Its just a tip on how to make it clear for any reader.

Quote: Jerf Roberwitz @ January 19, 2008, 4:48 PM

SlagA No comment rankles me, my replies are meant as humourous banter.

View original

The 'your ego shone brightly' in Bussels 'LOL' critique is not humourous banter, the only way that can come across is as an insult.

First, the formatting:

Quote: Jerf Roberwitz @ January 19, 2008, 1:50 PM

Three Drunks In Chip Shop

Drunk 1 sings to the tune of FLY ME TO THE MOON
Fry me to the moon
Cod and chips and make it soon.

Drunk 2 sings to the tune of .....

View original

Easy, then everyone gets the gag and then it makes no difference if the sketch is aural or visual.

As to banter. Ian didn't take it as such, nor did I. There were other digs today, too. Please PLEASE make yourself clear. Banter should never be inflammatory or snide.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ January 19, 2008, 5:00 PM

The 'your ego shone brightly' in Bussels 'LOL' critique is not humourous banter, the only way that can come across is as an insult.

View original

Exactly. It was a dig at the writer NOT the work.

As to wanting to get rid of you. Nonsense. If that was the situation, then you'd have gone weeks ago.