Hello All
Early version of a quick cartoon here: TAKEN DOWN. YOU'RE NOT MISSING ANYTHING . As always, any thoughts on the script, look, voices, music, sound (and anything else) would be grand.
Best Wishes
Yac
P.S. Might have to tighten-up the timing. Not sure yet.
Didn't like the voice...sounds too dumb. I liked the animation and the way he tapped his large belly. Working in that field, I won't drone on about the inaccuracies in the phrasing of the psychiatrists question...
Nothing special there I'm afraid for me.
Thanks Shandonbelle
Quote: Shandonbelle @ February 23 2012, 9:07 PM GMTWorking in that field, I won't drone on about the inaccuracies in the phrasing of the psychiatrists question...
You can if you want to. The current phrasing of the question was just because I wanted to set-up the sketch quickly (I want this to be a quick in-out sketch). I know psychiatrists don't really talk like that (saying "biggest mental problem" is a real stretch). May (or may not) change it to something just as concise but a little more realistic for the final version.
Do you not like the voice sounding too dumb because you believe it reflects badly on people you work around/with (him sounding dumb wasn't my intention, btw) or for another reason?
I just thought a more subtle voice and (less eye rolling!) would work better, right now it's a bit 'oh look I'm doolally' so there's no surprise to the reveal, which works bty.
The voice could be toned down a tad as It sounds a little over the top.
It's a nice enough quickie but it is gettable before the pay off.
Yeah, the punchline's obvious. Think I'm going to have to make the whole thing quicker (get the sketch over and done with).
I am not sure getting in and out quicker is going to help. The set up line has absolutely nowhere else to go. Sorry.
It's cool. I'll make something else I think.