That's a big monument.
Status report Page 4,219
I did'nt get acknowledged for 2000 posts! well done B anana.
At the cash machine outside my flat, I saw a guy out of the corner of my eye who looked a bit like my flatmate.
I did a double-take. It wasn't my flatmate, but sure enough...
"What the f**k are you looking at?"
That's pretty typical for my neighbourhood.
"Oh, sorry mate, I just thought you looked a bit like my flatmate for a sec there."
"Why?"
"Similar hat."
"Do I look like a flatmate?!" the guy starts raging. "A flatmate?! A flatmate you c**t?!"
That's not a typo, by the way, he really was saying "a" flatmate, not "your" flatmate.
I started walking away but he followed me, muttering "flatmate flatmate flatmate flatmate flatmate", like some kind of mantra, under his breath.
Just as I was about to enter my building, he grabbed me by my shoulder and turned me to face him.
I was surprised to see that he was crying. Weeping, really. Tears streaming all down his face. He could barely speak. He seemed genuinely upset.
"Can I be your flatmate?" he eventually managed to say.
He fell to his knees.
"Can I? Can I?" he sobbed.
I quickly went inside my building and legged it up the stairs, because the front door doesn't lock properly at the moment and I didn't want him to follow me to my flat.
F**ker managed to find my place anyway. Starts banging on the door of my flat, yelling "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'll be good."
I pushed a table up against the front door and called the police.
They left five minutes ago.
Turns out the guy was my flatmate.
Just booked a flight to my old hometown in Florida for late April and early May.
My reasoning:
1) My daughter and grandson will also be visiting.
2) So will my parents.
3) And one of my brothers.
4) I can catch up with old friends.
5) My favourite pub is now back in the hands of the original owner and they've tripled it in size, back to its pre-hurricane glory.
(Guess which of the above was the deciding factor?)
Quote: DaButt @ January 20 2012, 12:48 AM GMTJust booked a flight to my old hometown in Florida for late April and early May.
My reasoning:
1) My daughter and grandson will also be visiting.
2) So will my parents.
3) And one of my brothers.
4) I can catch up with old friends.
5) My favourite pub is now back in the hands of the original owner and they've tripled it in size, back to its pre-hurricane glory.
(Guess which of the above was the deciding factor?)
It'll be nice to catch up with brother Zak again.
Quote: Kevin Murphy @ January 19 2012, 5:27 PM GMTAt the cash machine outside my flat, I saw a guy out of the corner of my eye who looked a bit like my flatmate.
I did a double-take. It wasn't my flatmate, but sure enough...
"What the f**k are you looking at?"
That's pretty typical for my neighbourhood.
"Oh, sorry mate, I just thought you looked a bit like my flatmate for a sec there."
"Why?"
"Similar hat."
"Do I look like a flatmate?!" the guy starts raging. "A flatmate?! A flatmate you c**t?!"
That's not a typo, by the way, he really was saying "a" flatmate, not "your" flatmate.
I started walking away but he followed me, muttering "flatmate flatmate flatmate flatmate flatmate", like some kind of mantra, under his breath.
Just as I was about to enter my building, he grabbed me by my shoulder and turned me to face him.
I was surprised to see that he was crying. Weeping, really. Tears streaming all down his face. He could barely speak. He seemed genuinely upset.
"Can I be your flatmate?" he eventually managed to say.
He fell to his knees.
"Can I? Can I?" he sobbed.
I quickly went inside my building and legged it up the stairs, because the front door doesn't lock properly at the moment and I didn't want him to follow me to my flat.
F**ker managed to find my place anyway. Starts banging on the door of my flat, yelling "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'll be good."
I pushed a table up against the front door and called the police.
They left five minutes ago.
Turns out the guy was my flatmate.
Quote: Oldrocker @ January 20 2012, 12:50 AM GMTIt'll be nice to catch up with brother Zak again.
I guess I should add this one:
6) A cute girl 14 years my junior who I used to fool around with recently told me that she'd broken up with her boyfriend and would "really like to see me again." 
Quote: Will Cam @ January 19 2012, 4:12 PM GMTHere's one he sends to everyone
With a graphics program (I use Picture Publisher 8) I can make that look like daylight with all details revealed.
But I will refrain from postinng it. 'cos we know it's really a pic of you WillCam
He is not naked by the way, he is wearing a watch and a pair of trainers.
Quote: Kevin Murphy @ January 19 2012, 5:27 PM GMTAt the cash machine outside my flat, I saw a guy out of the corner of my eye who looked a bit like my flatmate.
I did a double-take. It wasn't my flatmate, but sure enough...
"What the f**k are you looking at?"
....
I pushed a table up against the front door and called the police.They left five minutes ago.
Turns out the guy was my flatmate.
Huh?
Quote: dellas @ January 19 2012, 5:13 PM GMT
stop it now Dellas........
Quote: billwill @ January 20 2012, 1:26 AM GMTWith a graphics program (I use Picture Publisher 8) I can make that look like daylight with all details revealed.
But I will refrain from postinng it. 'cos we know it's really a pic of you WillCam
Today I am mostly looking at this picture of a cat.
I don't approve of people who put their animals into clothes. Cats are meant to to be naked.
PERVERT.
Quote: zooo @ January 20 2012, 10:54 AM GMTPERVERT.
Quote: DaButt @ January 20 2012, 12:52 AM GMTI guess I should add this one:
6) A cute girl 14 years my junior who I used to fool around with recently told me that she'd broken up with her boyfriend and would "really like to see me again."
We have a winner.