Well not really like Pam Ayres, but do you think it can be successful?
I'll try.
'In the deep midwinter, snowy falls do flow, I tried to put me bin out long way to go.
In the deep midwinter, with the ice and snow, trudging with the weight I am so slow.
In the deep midwinter, need a helping hand, then a Official comes by me offers a hand, why so slow love get a gastric-band.
In the deep midwinter, I know where to go , just 'cos I's fat, I'll tell him shove it in your plough'.