Quote: TopBanana @ December 31 2011, 5:38 PM GMT
Gah...why can't us men know this kind of stuff?
So confusing.
Top Banana,
We've never met, I'm not even sure if we've ever even conversed on the BCG, but nonetheless, let me give you some proper, decent advice -
Get laid.
Once you've blown your knacker fat on some tart's juggs, you'll be able to take a more relaxed and balanced view of the situation.
You have two main options, save up and get a hooker or choose an easy shag down the pub. Be warned though, make sure the uggo / fatty / oldie you've selected for congress is up for it. Nothing will sink your self-esteem faster then getting turned down by the Elephant Man's uglier twin sister.
Whining on an Internet comedy forum that you can't get any muff in the hopes of a pity shag ain't gonna work. So man up, throw on some Blue Stratos / your lucky pants and grab a chunk of some unattractive poon-tang.
It will bolster your confidence, dispel the desperation vibe you're throwing off and will lead to even more sexual gymnastics, hopefully with someone you do actually want to shag.(And then if you so desire, you can have a 'relationship')
Remember, women are like dogs, they can sense weakness and despair and will only respond to a confident alpha male.
Good luck!
