Weird.
Status report Page 4,146
I'm off to bed. The clock is sleeping, so I'll get the chance to rest whilst I can.
CHIRP CHIRP.
Chip's just been out and bought two massively badly damaged tins of Quality Street for a pound.
Damaged how?
Quote: zooo @ December 12 2011, 12:42 PM GMTDamaged how?
Half the tins are completely crushed. But I'm sure my mom and sister won't mind.
Ha.
I want a tin of Roses. It won't be Christmas without them.
A joke for DaButt.
Mike Died:
==========Two guys meet up in a bar. The first one asks, "Did your hear the news - Mike is dead??!!!"
"Woah, what the hell happened to him?"
"Well he was on his way over to my house the other day and when he arrived outside the house he didn't brake properly and boom - He hit the curb, the car flipped over and he crashed through the sunroof - Went flying through the air and smashed through my upstairs bedroom window."
"What a horrible way to die!"
"No no, he survived that, that didn't kill him at all. So, he's landed in my upstairs bedroom and he's all covered in broken glass on the floor. Then, he spots the big old antique wardrobe we have in the room and reaches up for the handle to try to pull himself up. He's just dragging himself up when bang, this massive wardrobe comes crashing down on top of him, crushing him and breaking most of his bones."
"What a way to go, that's terrible!"
"No no, that didn't kill him he survived that. He managed to get the wardrobe off him and crawls out onto the landing, he tries to pull himself up on the banister but under his weight, the banister breaks and he goes falling down on to the first floor. In mid air, all the broken banister poles spin and fall on him, pinning him to the floor, sticking right through him."
"Now that is the most unfortunate way to go!"
"No no, that didn't kill him, he even survived that. So he's on the downstairs landing, just beside the kitchen. He crawls in to the kitchen, tries to pull himself up on the stove, but reached for a big pot of boiling hot water, whoosh, the whole thing came down on him and burned most of his skin off him."
"Man, what a way to go!"
"No no, he survived that, he survived that! He's lying on the ground, covered in boiling water and he spots the phone and tries to pull himself up, to call for help, but instead he grabs the light switch and pulls the whole thing off the wall and the water and electricity didn't mix and so he got electrocuted, wallop, 10,000 volts shot through him."
"Now that is one awful way to go!"
"No no, he survived that..."
"Hold on now, just how the hell did he die?"
"I shot him!"
"You shot him? What the hell did you shoot him for?"
"He was wrecking my f*cking house."
Great a few jokes tonight! thanks guys!
Feel like death - very, very, very bad cold. Might even have to go to bed early, which I hate, considering it a waste of my life time.
Nice joke, Bill.
I've had a great weekend with my family. My grandson was baptized yesterday and then we had a nice gathering in a neighborhood where Lamborghinis are left in the driveway. Today we had an early Christmas and stuffed ourselves with prime rib and beer.
It would appear that I have met a convicted murderer (though he wasn't at the time)
http://crimeblog.dallasnews.com/archives/2011/12/man-pleads-guilty-to-murdering.html
This guy presented at our company conference a couple of years ago. The video of his presentation is still in the member area of our website. My colleague had a meal with him and the victim just days before it all happened.
It never ceases to amaze me how a decision made in a split second can utterly change the direction of someone's life. It may have built up to that point over several months but he still had a choice until the final terrible moment.
Crickey what an experience, do killers really seem 'normal' this really worries me.
We're all potential killers -- even us normal people. All it takes is the right circumstances.