NJ: May the Force...

I had high hopes for this 'un. Roll on next week.

JUSTIN:
Getting involved in an argument is like sleeping with a woman when the decorators are in; occasionally you have to settle it in the ring. Theresa May and Kenneth Clarke are doing just that. Let's go over to our boxing correspondent Amy Fistwell.

F/X BOXING ARENA ATMOSPHERE

AMY:
Thanks Justin. Clarke has just entered the ring to The Final Countdown, the man just loves Europe. It looks like Jimmy Melon Junior is ready to get this fight on!

JIMMY:
Ladies and Gentleman, it's time for the main event of the evening. Introducing first, fighting out of the blue corner, wearing the size 54 shorts, he's undefeated in 37 fights against salad, he's the EU obsessed veteran, the dinosaur with the minor flaw, the Conservative with a preservative, it's Kenneth 'knock her spark' Clarke.

JIMMY:
And his opponent across the ring, wearing the kitten heels, with a record so outlandish it's almost certainly untrue, she's the queen of mean, the prat with a cat, The Tory with a story, she's Theresa 'The Snarling Thuds of' May.

JIMMY:
Let's get ready to rumble!

F/X A BELL RINGS THEN FIGHT SOUNDS

AMY:
And it's over in the very first round. May has won by knockout; she caught him flush on one of his chins.

JUSTIN:
Thanks Amy, I was told in confidence that Theresa was a useless fighter, thanks very much Chris Huhne. I knew I should have listened to Wayne Rooney's Dad.

Quote: Gerry McDonnell @ October 14 2011, 12:15 AM BST

AMY:
And it's over in the very first round. May has won by knockout; she caught him flush on one of his chins.

View original

Some funny lines in there Gerry, sorry to hear it didn't get on.

I'm sure I'm being really thick, but I didn't get the intro gag though.

Brave intro gag!

Good gags in this and it's nice and short. Good gag at the end too. Think the setting needs a bit more about what they're arguing about cos I didn't know this story (and, believe me, I've read a *lot* of newspapers this week!)

Dan

Quote: swerytd @ October 14 2011, 10:57 AM BST

Brave intro gag!

View original

Ahh, I get the gag now. Google and Urban dictionary to the rescue Funny joke, but I wonder if it's too near the knuckle for NJ? Still, what do I know, not got anything on this series.

Gotta say I read the intro and 2 anal sex jokes? You do know you blew it before you even got into the sketch.

The sketch is quite funny and the boxing lines are very good. But it maybe a bit contrived for Newsjack, they seem to like simpler stuff.

Quote: Ishy @ October 14 2011, 11:23 AM BST

Funny joke, but I wonder if it's too near the knuckle for NJ?

View original

Making a good fist of that pun.

Quote: Ishy @ October 14 2011, 11:23 AM BST

Ahh, I get the gag now. Google and Urban dictionary to the rescue Funny joke, but I wonder if it's too near the knuckle for NJ?

View original

It was a gamble, a poor one on reflection

It made me laugh Gerry, but it's a bit blue for the beeb, maybe newsrevue would consider it?

Quote: AngieBaby @ October 14 2011, 10:13 PM BST

It made me laugh Gerry, but it's a bit blue for the beeb, maybe newsrevue would consider it?

View original

Stranger things have happened Ange, not many though

Thanks for the feedback everyone. Going forward, I'll keep the back-door references to a minimum.

Some good jokes here Gerry, although it drops off a bit. Agree with Sooty, you're not helping yourself with bumming and fisting references. Some people find it distasteful apparently.

Funny writing; not the most original angle, but one that works. But as other have said keep it clean for Radio 4.