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An excerpt

Any feedback on below appreciate. It's an excerpt from something larger I'm writing. I suspect it's a bit juvenile, unoriginal and derivative - but I think it'd get laughs!

Scene - Outside/Mall/Street

Cliché (Frenchman) sobbing quietly on side of street

Mary with two lads walking by

Mary: Alright mister... are you alright?

Cliché: My dream is out of my reach, my dream will not ... be (makes gripping action with fist)

Lad1: Come'on Mary, leave him

Mary: Get off (to Lad1), sorry mister, what's wrong?

Cliché: My dream job... I want to work in a... boulangerie

Lad2: A what?

Cliché: There is no boulangerie here in Britain (/or wherever set). There's not even a creperie!

Lad1: A crapery?

Mary: (to Lad1 and Lad2) A bakery or a creperie - pancakes!

Lad1: This nut is a pancake! Come on!

Mary: There's a bakery just around the corner (said to the lads)

Cliché: A bakery?

Mary: A place they make bread, cakes and "buns". Made by a "baker".

Cliché: A "baker"! - Of course a "baker" makes "buns". All the while I've been looking for a big "Boulangerie" sign. I should have been looking for a sign that says "Baker"!

Out of corner of scene comes a girl carrying a tray of buns

Cliché sees the girl (Girl with buns, GWB) and grows excited and runs to her

Cliché: Mademoiselle, Mademoiselle, whose buns are they?

GWB: They're for me old man

Mary: She means her daddy

Cliché: Is your "daddy" a "baker", because you've got lovely "buns"
!
GWB: No, the buns are for me old man - it's his birthday. I got them in the bakers around there (points)

Cliché: (very interested in the buns) You must be careful with your buns, they are wobbling (does actions) and jiggling.

GWB: I know, I can't keep them still, they're just too big

Cliché: You need some support for those buns. You need an over-the-shoulder (does actions) "bun" holder!

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