I was just sitting here looking at some of my scribbles[as you do] and came across things like:
Schizophrenic Hostage Negotiator "Come out I`ve got you surrounded."
A speech therapist with a lisp.
A parrot with a stutter.
No Problob...Biagra...Adaffable...
Is just me or have we all got bits of things written down and don`t know what we were going to use them for? 
I sat down a few months ago looking through loads of pads and especially my early stuff it's all useless crap.
I'd do massive spider graphs of "funny things" and how I could construct jokes ect. And the odd bad sketch with no real punchline.
Just shows that practice really doesn't matter when it comes to writing 
(with me anyway)
When I got raided by the police in May (animal rights stuff) they spent 5 hours here removing bits of paper with exactly the shit that you have described. I haven't got even the slightest idea what most of it means as it's writing stuff and they probably are going to book me down as the plotter from hell.
Talk yourself out of that one!!! 
I'll just come right out and ask... Animal rights?
What are you saying, you devil?
Hey Marion, were you part of the people who desecrated the grave of the guinea pig breeder?
Now, that would be illegal, wouldn't it?
Moderately funny story about that. Gladys' (body) was missing and I held an international Animal Rights (AR) gathering here. Gladys was high profile and still to this day nobody has ever been convicted of digging her up - most likely because she wasn't by AR.
My old mum wanted to join in with the fun of the gathering and wanted to walk up the field but she's nearly 90 and knackard. So some mates got her on a long trolley and pulled her, flat out like a corpse, on the trolley up the field.
The police helicopters were going mad overhead and I'm surprised that they didn't raid us for having a trophy Gladys for the event which turned out to be my mum.
Sadly they didn't but it would have made a good comedy if they had have.
I have a file on my PC that's about 300 pages long of ideas and jokes I've written over the last 8 years.
Most of them are unfunny, derivative and basically shit. It's an annoying thing to have, so I just ignore it.
Now everything just goes in a pad where I think out loud.
Quote: Seefacts @ January 10, 2008, 11:16 AMI have a file on my PC that's about 300 pages long of ideas and jokes I've written over the last 8 years.
Most of them are unfunny, derivative and basically shit. It's an annoying thing to have, so I just ignore it.
Now everything just goes in a pad where I think out loud.
Hi, mate,
Do you find that there's a little voice inside that goes, 'got potential, store for another day'
I store stuff and go back to it ages later and sort of understand what I meant at the time.
Quote: marion @ January 10, 2008, 11:14 AMNow, that would be illegal, wouldn't it?
It's the people who are invovled in this kind of stupidity who turn any sympathy the public may have with 'AR' activists into totally justifiable hatred and contempt. And is it not a little ironic that people who claim that 'animals' have just as many rights as 'man' should treat others in this way? Hopefully whoever is responsible for this and similar incidents will be caught and dealt with with the full force of the law. Do they not understand the bad name they are giving to an otherwise (relatively) noble cause?
Quote: marion @ January 10, 2008, 11:18 AMHi, mate,
Do you find that there's a little voice inside that goes, 'got potential, store for another day'
I store stuff and go back to it ages later and sort of understand what I meant at the time.
Yeah, it'd be stuff I heard or something that happened and I write it down.
Or I'd think of a joke on the bus and write it down - however this dates back to when I was 16, ie when I wasn't funny. Thus leaving me lumbered with shit material.
Quote: Seefacts @ January 10, 2008, 11:36 AMOr I'd think of a joke on the bus and write it down - however this dates back to when I was 16, ie when I wasn't funny. Thus leaving me lumbered with shit material.
It's probably not shit if you put a different spin on it, or think about it with your new-found maturity. 
The idea must have had some merit at the time, or you wouldn't have written it down, so consider it and think through before you discard it completely.
Dan
Have to agree with Aaron.
I have this all the time - the product of carrying a notebook regardless of my state of sobriety. I just opened said book to a random page and found the following (reproduced with spellin errors):
"Emptying my vowels
Teh c**t of Monte Christo
Supermarkettiquette
Sneaking helium into packiges
I love writing but I hate the paperwork."
That last one seemed a little too clever for a 'train home from the pub' idea, and I've since discovered it to be cribbed from elsewhere.
I have many scribbles i can't even read anymore, written in a rush so as not to forget them.