As I've already said above, this is just a quick message to say "hi", and to introduce myself to you all - it's so nice to finally find a website full of like-minded and slightly tortured souls. When I get a moment I'll forward on the address.
My name is Simon, and I like to tell people that I'm a writer. Of course, I then have to then spend the next hour feigning interest while politely brushing aside their ideas that would all, "make a best selling book". As soon as they start with, "Oh, here's one for you," I pray for the quick release that never comes.
I took a year off - around about 18 months ago now - to complete my novel, but all I have managed to do so far is contemplate my navel.
I have had some "stuff" published over the last few years; reviews for CDs and DVDs for example, interviews and articles for DVD "extras" and on-line fanzines, as well as a double page spread on Ridley Scott and Orlando Bloom in the massive seller that is "Impact". I know, I know, what can I say? Except that it was publicity basically for their film "Kingdom of Heaven". The royalty cheque's still in the post apparently. As well as doing all this, I have found the time from somewhere in my hectic schedule to write the first draft of a sitcom revolving around a country undertakers... the dust in my top draw finds it all so hilarious.
I was also commissioned to write the script(s) for an animated kiddies programme about a Tadpole, called "Tad", as if you couldn't guess, but, unfortunately, this "passing" recession seems to have put pay to that idea, and then poor old Tad was promptly eaten by a passing stickleback just after being released back into the village pond.
"Oh, the humanity!" I hear you all cry. "Won't someone think of the children?" Don't fear though, there are another 17 where he came from.
Anyway, that's enough from me. I said I'd be quick... and I haven't been - you should see the length of my novel. Not to mention the state of my navel.
Thanks for now.
Simon