British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 491

Quote: dellas @ August 13 2011, 6:05 AM BST

:( Yes it is in their interest to continue the theory to annoy the Russians.

Not believing in the moon landing is just a confession of ignorance

Not least because it ignores the actual conspiracy

To invest billions in military missile designs and intimidate the Russians whi lst using a civilian budge.

Quote: catskillz @ August 13 2011, 2:39 AM BST

The Moon-landing hoax goes deep, deep into all sorts of occult shit. For example, did you know that both Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin were Freemasons? Freemasons are meant worship Satan (at the top level, not the average guys like my Grandfather and Great Grandfather, who make up the majority), supposedly getting up to all sorts of sick shit, e.g. sodomising little boys in the hope that it will help them live longer? Anyway, the conspiracy theorists reckon the Freemasons were deeply involved in the moon hoax, and Aldrin even sent them a little coded message from the "surface", when he used a 6-iron golf club to hit a ball for the camera and needed three swings before he hit it. Three swings of a 6-iron = 666. Crazy, I know.

By the way, did you know that the most famous Freemason in America, a man called Albert Pike, was also the founder of the KKK? The top level of Freemasonry is the 33rd Degree, 33 = 3 times 11, and the eleventh letter of the alphabet is K, so KKK = 3 times 11, which takes you back to 33.

Oh, and the Washington monument is exactly 666 feet tall. Most people don't know this, because part of it is underground, making it appear smaller. That and the fact that they've got social lives that are more exciting than mine, obviously.

My percentage has just risen 80%.

Ok I'm part of a sinister conspiracy to rule the world, molest boy scouts, flouridise water what ever.

So now I'm going to leave idiotic clues all over the place for halfwits to osess over.

Coming in a bit late on the Moon landing conspiracy . .

If is was faked, how come not one of the participants both up there and down here in NASA has ever broken ranks and gone to the press to tell them? If they had absolute proof they could clear up £/$millions.

Hey DaButt, is this someone you've heard of ?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-14514429

Quote: Oldrocker @ August 13 2011, 11:35 AM BST

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-14514429

Heard a debate on him talking about the amazing lowered gun crime. Which we have hardly any of.
Presumably if they're going to get zero tolerance about everything, they'll be increasing the bins and adding ashtrays to every street so people don't get done for dropping litter or fag butts. Or would that take money and effort that could be spent employing yet another government advisor when there are are job cuts for everyone else?
And who on earth does he think is going to enforce all these plans out on the street? The police who didn't have enough numbers to interfere with riots?

Even later to the conspiracy theory thread.
Re Washington Monument. Not conspiracy as such but while staying in DC a frind who lives there told me about the masonic connection in getting it built. And look at a greenback. It's got the pyramid and eye thingy on it.

Moon landings. I think they went and you non believers are just getting confused with Capricorn One.

And if the moon landings were fake, why not fake a Mars landing too? And a Europa one? And why didn't the Russians and Chinese fight back with their own fake moon landings? Us too - why didn't Wilson fake sending a Brit to the moon? That said, Capricorn One is a great movie.

There have been a lot of questions asked on the last few pages of this thread, and I can answer all of them, if I find the time (my nephew wants to play footie!).

For now, I thought I'd post a clip that highlights just how little we really know about the history of this planet: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_PfhV_Hns4&feature=related

Catskillz could you give me a hint if

1 you've gone mental
2 you're pulling our legs

Quote: catskillz @ August 13 2011, 2:51 PM BST

my nephew wants to play footie!

I really would suggest that that is a much healthier use of your time.

Quote: Timbo @ August 13 2011, 3:23 PM BST

I really would suggest that that is a much healthier use of your time.

It's not. People playing football in parks, gardens or streets are bloody annoying. The government should ban them as it is usually the the thin end of the anti-social wedge.

Quote: sootyj @ August 13 2011, 3:11 PM BST

Catskillz could you give me a hint if

1 you've gone mental
2 you're pulling our legs

You'd better ask these people first: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K71W1vGZ1ME&feature=related

Quote: Nogget @ August 13 2011, 6:52 AM BST

There's plenty more;

Marco Polo=swimming game
World Series=US-only series
Snarky (bad)=sarky (good)
compact=small car
car=tank
liberal=conscientious
cheese=plastic slice
AAA rating= history

any others?

"I'm taking The Tube."

uk - I'm catching a train
us - I'm stealing the television

Catskills, what's the opinion in your conspiracy community about the death of Princess Diana and Dodi Fayed?

I have no idea beyond personal opinion, but what's the general consensus? A Mossad thing, or MI5?

Verity of a conspiracy can usually be measured by who stands to gain what.

'Credit' for landing on the moon isn't enough, for example.

Coca-Cola initiating and funding a small and bloody revolution somewhere because they want to install a plant on the vacuated land, for example, is.

Quote: catskillz @ August 9 2011, 7:37 PM BST

Here's where I heard it (skip to 6:32): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGMGycNL-Mw&feature=related

Skip to 6:32.

Quote: catskillz @ August 13 2011, 4:24 PM BST

Skip to 6:32.

It's very believable, no doubt about it.

Seems a bit of a risky and high profile venture, centre of paris, car crash, as opposed to slipping something in her drink, but still, very believable.

Quote: catskillz @ August 9 2011, 6:57 PM BST

So what does everyone think about this bollocks about there being no water-canon in the whole of the country? It reminds me of Princess Diana's death, where apparently the ambulance took 95 minutes to get her to the hospital, and all the CCTV and Police radio in the area had mysteriously stopped working that night. Also, did you know that a papparazzi guy who saw it all was shot and killed? It was all covered up. Apparently Mossad were behind it, because they knew that Diana was about to start campaigning for peace in the Middle East, visiting injured Palestinian children etc, and they weren't very pleased about it.

I mentioned Mossad, but British Intelligence and C.I.A. were obviously involved too. They're all one in the same.

Mitchell And Webb are onto the Diana murder too:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoZ71sj3Kn0

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