British Comedy Guide

Status report Page 3,920

Quote: zooo @ July 24 2011, 12:52 PM BST

Ah, in that case, a swift knee to the groin would be better. Then you won't lose your balance.

I have absolutely no sense of balance, so will have to settle for a thoroughly British scowl and since I was so offended, a tut.

Quote: sootyj @ July 24 2011, 12:53 PM BST

N.B. someone who shouts like that isn't so much shouting at you as bemoaning his genuine and deep inadequance as a man.

And how the only lady to offer him comfort is mistress palm and her 5 daughters.

Thanks, makes me feel better to know that he'll die unloved and alone, probably in a compromising situation that the ambulance crew will laugh at

A muttered 'dickhead' under the breath probably wouldn't go amiss either.

Actual words are good when walking, but not jogging! Maybe I could print your avatar and hold it up at appropriate moments?

Probably the best advice is keep your eyes ahead and ignore him/them. There are some dubious people in this world.

Quote: AJGO @ July 24 2011, 1:17 PM BST

Actual words are good when walking, but not jogging! Maybe I could print your avatar and hold it up at appropriate moments?

Yeah!
Or give him the good old fashioned one finger salute.

Quote: Marc P @ July 24 2011, 1:21 PM BST

Probably the best advice is keep your eyes ahead and ignore him/them. There are some dubious people in this world.

True. And people like that are bound to get their comeuppance soon elsewhere, making a comment at a judo expert, or a drunk hard bloke's girlfriend.

Develop a "don't mess with me" aura. Some people radiate so much menace and threat you dare not even look at them.

Quote: chipolata @ July 24 2011, 1:35 PM BST

Develop a "don't mess with me" aura. Some people radiate so much menace and threat you dare not even look at them.

I've calmed that down now, and wear fake glasses.

Do they have a fake nose and eyebrows attached?

Quote: Marc P @ July 24 2011, 1:54 PM BST

I've calmed that down now, and wear real glasses. With a fake Marc P attached.

It's very convincing, what's it made from?

No but I like the idea!! Maybe I could go on the apprentice and pretend to be a boffin. :)

Teed up...

Cocks like that are just after attention

ignore them

they're after a reaction so don't give them the satisfaction

Quote: lofthouse @ July 24 2011, 2:29 PM BST

Cocks like that are just after attention

ignore them

they're after a reaction so don't give them the satisfaction

This is very true, but sometimes if you're walking down the street and a man shouts 'tits' as they pass, you tend to jump and so can't continue with an air of studied unawareness. Why do some men do this? Has a woman ever needed the clarification? Am I amongst a small number who don't turn around and go 'brilliant! Let's shag right here'?

I blame rap music and Carry On films

Yeah, I should probably stop going out in my blinged-up matron outfit

Quote: DaButt @ July 24 2011, 12:21 AM BST

From 3 PM Friday until well after dark on Sunday there is always a party going on at someone's house. Beer, swimming pools, shared meals and friendly sharing of household work. Last week we all helped a woman move her belongings and this morning we helped a guy lay new sod on his front yard. Now we're all heading out for dinner and drinks.

That actually sounds like hell to me.

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