British Comedy Guide

The saddest thing you have ever done Page 4

Quote: chipolata @ July 14 2011, 11:06 AM BST

What is Vampire Diaries like? I tempted to get it on DVD.

It's a bit teen drama-y, I'll not lie. Kind of Dawson's Creek melodrama with supernatural entities, but I really enjoy it. Especially in the first series, it's got a really nice gothic feel and is a little bit creepy.

I have watched, bodice ripping for guys sometimes, but nicely filmed.

Bodice ripping for guys? I think ts the opposite. Very much a girl appeal- like Twilight but less offensively shit.

What ever happened to scary, f**k off murderous vampires. Great white skinned metaphors for our weedy sex phobia.

All this Twilight et al stuff is dreadful.

Might I reccomend a healthy dose of Nancy A Collins, Salem's Lot and the original of course.

SUPER INJUCTION WARNING
Sootyj will sue anyone who mentions the fact that he may at one point played Vampire the Masquerade.

The saddest thing I would ever *do* (if possible) would be to watch re-runs of Noel's House Party on my projector, and try not to laugh so hard that orange juice escapes out my nose.

A long time ago my ex-girlfriend's Dad had scoffed at me for wanting to write TV comedy, saying I didn't have a cat in Hell's chance. I'm ashamed to say I photocopied a Fist Of Fun logo and wrote a fake letter to myself from the company saying how great my material was and how they wanted to work with me in the future, then showed him it. It shut him up but I've always thought it was the height of sadness.

Also back then when I was on the dole and living by myself in a council high-rise flat, I'd spent the last of my giro on cheap perry wine and fags and had no money left for food, and survived for three days on a solitary packet of Paxo stuffing.

But the saddest thing I ever did was at the same high-rise council flat, and a gift catalogue came through the door, addressed to the previous occupants. It was my girlfriend's birthday coming up so I ordered a teddy bear for her with a personalised message on its jumper. The message I put on it was "From chucklebunny to cherubim", because it was our cutesy nicknames for each other. Sad? It gets sadder.
Even though I'd paid for the teddy bear, about a month later there was a knock on the door. It was two burly policemen who informed me it was illegal to order goods on someone else's account, and promptly arrested me for fraud. I spent a day in the cells and had to endure the abject humiliation of giggling coppers popping their heads round the cell door every five minutes saying "Are you alright Chucklebunny?", and "How's cherubim?". They let me off with a caution, but not before raiding my flat for any other contraband. They didn't find any of course, (because there wasn't any) but when I got back to the flat I discovered that they'd found an ancient VHS porn movie in a drawer. They'd left a note stuck to it that read "Tut tut, what would Cherubim say?"

I feel cleansed after telling you all that. It's quite therapeutic.

Now I'm off to kill myself.

Laughing out loud Sounds grim, not even any gravy.

Quote: Lee Henman @ July 19 2011, 11:14 PM BST

A long time ago my ex-girlfriend's Dad had scoffed at me for wanting to write TV comedy, saying I didn't have a cat in Hell's chance. I'm ashamed to say I photocopied a Fist Of Fun logo and wrote a fake letter to myself from the company saying how great my material was and how they wanted to work with me in the future, then showed him it. It shut him up but I've always thought it was the height of sadness.

Also back then when I was on the dole and living by myself in a council high-rise flat, I'd spent the last of my giro on cheap perry wine and fags and had no money left for food, and survived for three days on a solitary packet of Paxo stuffing.

But the saddest thing I ever did was at the same high-rise council flat, and a gift catalogue came through the door, addressed to the previous occupants. It was my girlfriend's birthday coming up so I ordered a teddy bear for her with a personalised message on its jumper. The message I put on it was "From chucklebunny to cherubim", because it was our cutesy nicknames for each other. Sad? It gets sadder.
Even though I'd paid for the teddy bear, about a month later there was a knock on the door. It was two burly policemen who informed me it was illegal to order goods on someone else's account, and promptly arrested me for fraud. I spent a day in the cells and had to endure the abject humiliation of giggling coppers popping their heads round the cell door every five minutes saying "Are you alright Chucklebunny?", and "How's cherubim?". They let me off with a caution, but not before raiding my flat for any other contraband. They didn't find any of course, (because there wasn't any) but when I got back to the flat I discovered that they'd found an ancient VHS porn movie in a drawer. They'd left a note stuck to it that read "Tut tut, what would Cherubim say?"

I feel cleansed after telling you all that. It's quite therapeutic.

Now I'm off to kill myself.

Chucklebunny.....? I'm surprised they didn't do you under the trades descriptions act!! ;)

Quote: Lee Henman @ July 19 2011, 11:14 PM BST

I spent a day in the cells and had to endure the abject humiliation of giggling coppers popping their heads round the cell door every five minutes saying "Are you alright Chucklebunny?", and "How's cherubim?". They let me off with a caution, but not before raiding my flat for any other contraband. They didn't find any of course, (because there wasn't any) but when I got back to the flat I discovered that they'd found an ancient VHS porn movie in a drawer. They'd left a note stuck to it that read "Tut tut, what would Cherubim say?"

Teehee! Poor Henman.
It is quite nice to know that policemen have a sense of humour though.

Lee, don't know whether to laugh my head off or weep for you. Actually on further thought it's a laugh I badly need.

And you MUST be able to use this in writing.

Quote: zooo @ July 19 2011, 11:20 PM BST

Teehee! Poor Henman.
It is quite nice to know that policemen have a sense of humour though.

To be honest I've only-just remembered the note. This thread is like scratching old scars and making them bleed. :D

Quote: Marc P @ July 19 2011, 11:19 PM BST

Chucklebunny.....? I'm surprised they didn't do you under the trades descriptions act!! ;)

:D

Quote: keewik @ July 19 2011, 11:40 PM BST

Lee, don't know whether to laugh my head off or weep for you. Actually on further thought it's a laugh I badly need.

And you MUST be able to use this in writing.

Just laugh, I do. :)

That made me smile Henman. :D

Quote: Lee Henman @ July 19 2011, 11:14 PM BST

A long time ago my ex-girlfriend's Dad had scoffed at me for wanting to write TV comedy, saying I didn't have a cat in Hell's chance. I'm ashamed to say I photocopied a Fist Of Fun logo and wrote a fake letter to myself from the company saying how great my material was and how they wanted to work with me in the future, then showed him it. It shut him up but I've always thought it was the height of sadness.

Also back then when I was on the dole and living by myself in a council high-rise flat, I'd spent the last of my giro on cheap perry wine and fags and had no money left for food, and survived for three days on a solitary packet of Paxo stuffing.

But the saddest thing I ever did was at the same high-rise council flat, and a gift catalogue came through the door, addressed to the previous occupants. It was my girlfriend's birthday coming up so I ordered a teddy bear for her with a personalised message on its jumper. The message I put on it was "From chucklebunny to cherubim", because it was our cutesy nicknames for each other. Sad? It gets sadder.
Even though I'd paid for the teddy bear, about a month later there was a knock on the door. It was two burly policemen who informed me it was illegal to order goods on someone else's account, and promptly arrested me for fraud. I spent a day in the cells and had to endure the abject humiliation of giggling coppers popping their heads round the cell door every five minutes saying "Are you alright Chucklebunny?", and "How's cherubim?". They let me off with a caution, but not before raiding my flat for any other contraband. They didn't find any of course, (because there wasn't any) but when I got back to the flat I discovered that they'd found an ancient VHS porn movie in a drawer. They'd left a note stuck to it that read "Tut tut, what would Cherubim say?"

I feel cleansed after telling you all that. It's quite therapeutic.

Now I'm off to kill myself.

Laughing out loud Laughing out loud Funniest thing I have read in a long time.

Quote: chipolata @ July 13 2011, 10:49 AM BST

At school I went through a phase of recording Steve Wright in the Afternoon on C-90's so I could even listen to him when he wasn't on.

I used to to do that with Steve Wright and Adrian Just! Except I'd not record the songs. Basically it's the opposite of recording the Top 40 without the DJ.

Remember Mr Angry from Purley? Adrian Just was great too because it would play comedy clips from Hancock and the Goon Show so always good for a giggle.

The saddest thing is is that I believe that I do still have a couple of those tapes somewhere despite not having a tape deck anymore...except in the new car (which also has a CD multichanger)

Sorry, I'm rambling...

In the early hours of the morning, when they run out of programmes and start showing the Ceefax pages on BBC2, I leave them on because I like listening to the weird early '90s easy-listening instrumental background music they play over them.

Share this page