Before leaving this morning, Chip spooged the wasps nest in the shed with poison. He'll give it another dousing when he gets home. Then tomorrow whack it into a bin bag with a broom. 
Status report Page 3,874
Ellie came off her bike last night, hit her face, hurt her hand and is just basically a bruised lady right now.
Quote: EllieJP @ July 8 2011, 9:46 AM BSTEllie came off her bike last night, hit her face, hurt her hand and is just basically a bruised lady right not.
(Although it's probably karma for all those bloody tourists photos Blurry Rucksack Girl has ruined!)
Quote: EllieJP @ July 8 2011, 9:46 AM BSTEllie came off her bike last night, hit her face, hurt her hand and is just basically a bruised lady right now.
Matthew finally had a go at stand up last night, because he's a big brave boy; as you can no doubt imagine, he was amazing.
Quote: Matthew Stott @ July 8 2011, 11:16 AM BSTMatthew finally had a go at stand up last night, because he's a big brave boy; as you can no doubt imagine, he was amazing.
Well done on popping your cherry, Matt, and may I say how brave it was to have sex for the first time on stage in front of all those laughing people.
Quote: Matthew Stott @ July 8 2011, 11:16 AM BST
Matthew finally had a go at stand up last night, because he's a big brave boy; as you can no doubt imagine, he was amazing.
Ooh really? Good going 
On a related note, seems like the people who got through to the SYTYF semis were contacted yesterday. I wasn't. Aboo. I didnt expect to be through but I'm still disappointed
Quote: Nat Wicks @ July 8 2011, 11:23 AM BSTOn a related note, seems like the people who got through to the SYTYF semis were contacted yesterday. I wasn't. Aboo. I didnt expect to be through but I'm still disappointed
There will be other comps, you haven't being doing it that long.
Quote: chipolata @ July 8 2011, 9:34 AM BSTBefore leaving this morning, Chip spooged the wasps nest in the shed with poison. He'll give it another dousing when he gets home. Then tomorrow whack it into a bin bag with a broom.
You just happened to have some "poison" at home then!!
Quote: Nat Wicks @ July 8 2011, 11:23 AM BSTOoh really? Good going
On a related note, seems like the people who got through to the SYTYF semis were contacted yesterday. I wasn't. Aboo. I didnt expect to be through but I'm still disappointed
There are comps running all the time, just hop on another one. And don't be put off by the "you must have been performing less than a year" policy of most of these contests, the winner's invariably been doing it 5 years plus.
Quote: Matthew Stott @ July 8 2011, 11:28 AM BST
There will be other comps, you haven't being doing it that long.
I know. This one's the biggie though. I'm very jealous of my friend who has got through.
Quote: bigfella @ July 8 2011, 11:31 AM BSTYou just happened to have some "poison" at home then!!
I phoned my mom, who asked Chip Snr, who has some death-in-a-tin. Which I went and picked up last night. Any more questions, Rumpole!
Wow. Chip has mentioned members of his family.
A red letter day, people!
Currently hacking down my material to try to get a set under 6 minutes for tonight's Funny Funny Newcastle showcase. Sigh. I hate cutting stuff out. It's there for a reason.
I'm about 10 seconds over. That'll have to do.
Quote: zooo @ July 8 2011, 12:26 PM BSTWow. Chip has mentioned members of his family.
*emails Griff to see if he can borrow his Diabolical Deletion Machine*
Quote: chipolata @ July 8 2011, 12:21 PM BSTI phoned my mom, who asked Chip Snr, who has some death-in-a-tin. Which I went and picked up last night. Any more questions, Rumpole!
No M'lud.
The witness is excused.