British Comedy Guide

How would you alter your body? Page 2

You need to watch it.

Is it only in America?

I'd make my penis smaller

Can you use it as your own natural chin rest?

Quote: catskillz @ July 6 2011, 8:07 PM BST

You need to watch it.

If you are into conspiracy theory bollocks, then yes.

Two elbows per arm. Handy for awkward itches and applying sunblock.

Quote: Timbo @ July 7 2011, 4:42 PM BST

If you are into conspiracy theory bollocks, then yes.

Give them credit, I bet it isn't bollocks, I bet Rockefeller does want to control the world with chips in people's arms. It seems as plausible as me wanting a bacon sandwhich for my lunch tomorrow, however both are fairly unlikely (I can't be bothered). Whether it will happen is a different thing, the world (the west at the very least) is getting much easier to manipulate with all this technology 'to make our lives easier', but some people can't be bought or forced to submit (I hope).

I agree with his point about why hasn't another 9/11 style incident happened (note I don't wish for this to be the case), but you could say that about the moon landings (There is a key argument why not but hey, I don't to spoil the thought). I would say take your bag of salt everywhere you go, but never dismiss anything entirely, after all it only takes one madman to be right.

Raptor Claws.

And wings. Big F**k off wings.

Wings with ***k off written on them? Someone will complain to Ofwings.

I'd like a Spine Protector. Although I imagine a safer spinal column would come at a cost to your walk.

You could get it kevlar plated?

Quote: chipolata @ July 7 2011, 11:13 PM BST

I'd like a Spine Protector. Although I imagine a safer spinal column would come at a cost to your walk.

Perhaps alter your DNA and become a human/turtle(or tortoise) hybrid.

No. I want a safer spine but to still be attractive to women.

Bubble-wrap back?

Quote: Bill Jaguar @ July 7 2011, 11:02 PM BST

I agree with his point about why hasn't another 9/11 style incident happened (note I don't wish for this to be the case), but you could say that about the moon landings.

Speaking of which: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmIWhzTzLn0&feature=related

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