I am with Sootj on this at the moment they are more what John Vorhaus calls a jokoid than a fully formed gag, the elements are there but you need to hone and buff. Bit like poetry or slogan writing I suppose. The rhythm and bounce and content all working together.
Well done though, good exercise and well done for sticking to it
yup sticking it is what allowed me to progress from a failure to a miserable failure.
But if you're doing this for standard you could go for the bigger, more generous and slightly easier didja foremat (which is more commonly used)
e.g.
didja hear that the government is worried that old people are becoming alcoholics? I told my granny but she just threw her colostomy bag and called me a c**t, before bursting into tears and telling me she's my best mate.
I mean old age drunks what a scary thought. Some grey haired old granny pestering you for 2 shillings to buy some sanatogen.
etc etc repeat until audience boo's me off the stage.
Quote: Marc P @ June 24 2011, 11:14 AM BSTI am with Sootj on this at the moment they are more what John Vorhaus calls a jokoid than a fully formed gag, the elements are there but you need to hone and buff. Bit like poetry or slogan writing I suppose. The rhythm and bounce and content all working together.
Well done though, good exercise and well done for sticking to it
Ye stick with it and remember the highest praise on critique is criticism, it means people see potential in you.
(says he whose current sketch is falling down the front page like a walrus in a lift shaft)