The first

A WALL IN A CAVE COVERED IN INTRICATE CAVE PAINTINGS.

A CAVE MAN WALKS IN CARRYING THE BODY OF A SABRE TOOTH TIGER

HE DROPS THE TIGER, STICKS A FINGER UP HIS BUM AND PAINTS A PICTURE OF HIM STRANGLING THE TIGER IN EPIC BATTLE

CAVEMAN LEAVES

CAVEMAN2 ENTERS HE IS CARRYING A MASSIVE SABRE TOOTHED BEAR CORPSE

HE DROPS THE BEAR CORPSE AND SHOVES A FINGER UP HIS BU AND PAINTS A PICTURE OF HIM PUNCHING THE BEAR TO DEATH

THEN HE ADDS A SMILEY FACE UNDER THE PICTURE OF THE TIGER STRANGLING

CAVE MAN 2 LEAVES

CAVE MAN 3 SNEAKS INTO THE CAVE LOOKS AT THE WALL, THEN SHOVES A FINGER UP HIS BUM

CAVEMAN 3 PAINTS A WINKING SMILEY FACE, FOLLOWED BY KISSY LIPS AND LOVE HEARTS AROUND DRAWINGS OF CAVEMAN 1 AND CAVE MAN 2, BEFORE GIVING THEM BIG WILLYS SO IT LOOKS LIKE THEY ARE WANKING THEM SELVES OFF

FADE TO BLACK

CARD APPEARS
"300,000 years later"

SCENE2
DAVID ATTENBOROUGH WALKS ON

DAVID
Amazing, this is indeed probably evidence of the world's first ever example of Dickhead Maximus. Better known as the troll.

DAVID ATTENBOROUGH LOOKS OVER HIS SHOULDER TO CHECK NO ONES WATCHING

HE SHOVES A FINGER UP HIS BUM AND WRITES ON THE CAVE WALL
"All cave men are homos"

Quote: sootyj @ June 5 2011, 10:53 PM BST

A WALL IN A CAVE COVERED IN INTRICATE CAVE PAINTINGS.

A CAVE MAN WALKS IN CARRYING THE BODY OF A SABRE TOOTH TIGER

HE DROPS THE TIGER, STICKS A FINGER UP HIS BUM AND PAINTS A PICTURE OF HIM STRANGLING THE TIGER IN EPIC BATTLE

CAVEMAN LEAVES

CAVEMAN2 ENTERS HE IS CARRYING A MASSIVE SABRE TOOTHED BEAR CORPSE

HE DROPS THE BEAR CORPSE AND SHOVES A FINGER UP HIS BU AND PAINTS A PICTURE OF HIM PUNCHING THE BEAR TO DEATH

THEN HE ADDS A SMILEY FACE UNDER THE PICTURE OF THE TIGER STRANGLING

View original

I like this but would prefer if it ended as above (...and for ease of filming, and for me personally, would work just as well, if not better, with an alternative source of paint)

That would work as a nice one punch, and certainly could lead to other quickies.

Good advice.

I do like the original though, must just be me.

I don't think you need the "troll" bit - it just doesn't scan.

Other than that I like it, even the ending!

A bit too crude for moi

For an internal BCG joke it is fine as is. For a wider audience, replace anal fingering with blood from the animals and forget the troll bit. You now have a very clever and very funny sketch (or comic strip).

Ok the troll bit was kinda central aaggh, I may follow your advice Mr Cam.

But rename it "The First Troll"

I like it ....I don't see how it would work if you took out the Troll bit, else what would David Attenborough discover?...I don't think it needs David doing any daubing though.

Really? That was my favourite bit, I could picture him saying
"All cavemen are homos"
in his fmaous dulcit tomes.

Quote: sootyj @ June 6 2011, 1:36 PM BST

Really? That was my favourite bit, I could picture him saying
"All cavemen are homos"
in his fmaous dulcit tomes.

View original

In that case, maybe instead, you could have him zoom in with his camera for a close up of the caveman's willy

Quote: Shandonbelle @ June 6 2011, 1:45 PM BST

In that case, maybe instead, you could have him zoom in with his camera for a close up of the caveman's willy

View original

Filth!

But did you like the sketch?

Oh sorry SootyJ was referring to SHandonbelle. I did like the sketch - not sure about the bottom prodding and smearing aspect. Not sure where the market would be for that. You know outside of Hampstead?

Quote: Marc P @ June 6 2011, 1:52 PM BST

Oh sorry SootyJ was referring to SHandonbelle. I did like the sketch - not sure about the bottom prodding and smearing aspect. Not sure where the market would be for that. You know outside of Hampstead?

View original

I suggested the close up to take Sooty's mind away from the dirty daubing David

Actually first sketch I wrote after a few beers, probably where all the botty poking came from...