Men will NEVER give a straightforward simple answer to a question - e.g. two days ago ...
ME: How many did you buy?
HIM: A packet.
ME: How many were in the sodding packet?
HIM: You're a bad-tempered bitch.
Sometimes it't like living in the HQ of MI5.
Quote: keewik @ May 10 2011, 4:35 PM BSTMen will NEVER give a straightforward simple answer to a question - e.g. two days ago ...
ME: How many did you buy?
HIM: A packet.
ME: How many were in the sodding packet?
HIM: You're a bad-tempered bitch.
Sometimes it't like living in the HQ of MI5.
Packet of what? Peanuts?
Steaks, if you must know.
Quote: keewik @ May 10 2011, 4:39 PM BST
You sent him out to hunt and gather and he returned with the kill - how's he meant to know how much meat was in the packet? Do you want a man or a mathematician?
Quote: Nat Wicks @ May 10 2011, 12:23 PM BSTI must be like an anti-female going from the posts in this thread. Maybe I've got a penis I don't know about.
If it helps, I was being sarcastic 
Though if you do turn out to be a man, marry me please 
I work with women in an office and I have to say they tend to be much more two faced than blokes!
They will slag someone off continually , yet as soon as that person wonders in theyre all pally and matey with them
hyopcrits!
or hypo-chicks if you like
sorry.... 
Quote: Matthew Stott @ May 10 2011, 12:27 PM BSTIf a man grows a beard, he's still able to attract the opposite sex; if women grow a beard, not so much.
I've just grown a beard. And the ladies still f**king despise me.
Mind you, that's not the fault of the beard so much and more to do with me being a dullard spastic.
Whhhaaat a twat!
I understand him, that packet
he had a steak in it
Loving these!
He thought his new sat-nav would be great at getting us to Coventry.
Twenty side streets and road works' later we were still back to Coventry outer ring bloody road.
Could No longer stand the female voice repeating 'At the next roundabout take the sixth exit' and Him saying 'Was that fifth or sixth?' I was feeling sick.
I turned it off used map and directed him into City centre, a left exit at traffic lights clearly showed Kearsley, hooray!
When we arrived at Hotel he seemed surly and moody, why?
He didn't even thank me for map reading.... 
Quote: dellas @ May 10 2011, 8:03 PM BST
He thought his new sat-nav would be great at getting us to Coventry.
Twenty side streets and road works' later we were still back to Coventry outer ring bloody road.
Could No longer stand the female voice repeating 'At the next roundabout take the sixth exit' and Him saying 'Was that fifth or sixth?' I was feeling sick.
I turned it off used map and directed him into City centre, a left exit at traffic lights clearly showed Kearsley, hooray!
When we arrived at Hotel he seemed surly and moody, why?
He didn't even thank me for map reading....
Cruel evil woman. Why not just castrate him & be done with it! 
Quote: lofthouse @ May 10 2011, 7:04 PM BSTI work with women in an office and I have to say they tend to be much more two faced than blokes!
They will slag someone off continually , yet as soon as that person wonders in theyre all pally and matey with them
hyopcrits!
And I just know they lez each other up whilst I have an aternoon wank in the gents
i read all about it in razzle
or hypo-chicks if you like
sorry....
yeh life should be more like razzle 'snot fair
Quote: dellas @ May 10 2011, 8:03 PM BST
He thought his new sat-nav would be great at getting us to Coventry.
Twenty side streets and road works' later we were still back to Coventry outer ring bloody road.
Could No longer stand the female voice repeating 'At the next roundabout take the sixth exit' and Him saying 'Was that fifth or sixth?' I was feeling sick.
I turned it off used map and directed him into City centre, a left exit at traffic lights clearly showed Kearsley, hooray!
When we arrived at Hotel he seemed surly and moody, why?
He didn't even thank me for map reading....
Be fair. My lady is a sat-nav lover and had trouble on the Coventry ring-road. It's crap.
whoo? howw?? what the ???
HEY!!!
ahhhh where would we be without sat-nav?
Quote: JoLaw @ May 10 2011, 6:55 PM BSTIf it helps, I was being sarcastic
Though if you do turn out to be a man, marry me please
OBVIOUSLY.
Stop trying to lesbian me, you lesbian.