British Comedy Guide

The difference between Men and Women thread Page 7

Men will NEVER give a straightforward simple answer to a question - e.g. two days ago ...

ME: How many did you buy?

HIM: A packet.

ME: How many were in the sodding packet?

HIM: You're a bad-tempered bitch.

Sometimes it't like living in the HQ of MI5.

Quote: keewik @ May 10 2011, 4:35 PM BST

Men will NEVER give a straightforward simple answer to a question - e.g. two days ago ...

ME: How many did you buy?

HIM: A packet.

ME: How many were in the sodding packet?

HIM: You're a bad-tempered bitch.

Sometimes it't like living in the HQ of MI5.

Packet of what? Peanuts?

Laughing out loud Steaks, if you must know.

Quote: keewik @ May 10 2011, 4:39 PM BST

Laughing out loud Steaks, if you must know.

You sent him out to hunt and gather and he returned with the kill - how's he meant to know how much meat was in the packet? Do you want a man or a mathematician?

Quote: Nat Wicks @ May 10 2011, 12:23 PM BST

I must be like an anti-female going from the posts in this thread. Maybe I've got a penis I don't know about.

If it helps, I was being sarcastic :)

Though if you do turn out to be a man, marry me please Smarmy

I work with women in an office and I have to say they tend to be much more two faced than blokes!

They will slag someone off continually , yet as soon as that person wonders in theyre all pally and matey with them

hyopcrits!

or hypo-chicks if you like

sorry.... :(

Quote: Matthew Stott @ May 10 2011, 12:27 PM BST

If a man grows a beard, he's still able to attract the opposite sex; if women grow a beard, not so much.

I've just grown a beard. And the ladies still f**king despise me. :(
Mind you, that's not the fault of the beard so much and more to do with me being a dullard spastic.

Whhhaaat a twat!

I understand him, that packet

he had a steak in it

:P Loving these!

He thought his new sat-nav would be great at getting us to Coventry.

Twenty side streets and road works' later we were still back to Coventry outer ring bloody road.

Could No longer stand the female voice repeating 'At the next roundabout take the sixth exit' and Him saying 'Was that fifth or sixth?' I was feeling sick.

I turned it off used map and directed him into City centre, a left exit at traffic lights clearly showed Kearsley, hooray!

When we arrived at Hotel he seemed surly and moody, why?

He didn't even thank me for map reading.... Rolling eyes Whistling nnocently

Quote: dellas @ May 10 2011, 8:03 PM BST

:P Loving these!

He thought his new sat-nav would be great at getting us to Coventry.

Twenty side streets and road works' later we were still back to Coventry outer ring bloody road.

Could No longer stand the female voice repeating 'At the next roundabout take the sixth exit' and Him saying 'Was that fifth or sixth?' I was feeling sick.

I turned it off used map and directed him into City centre, a left exit at traffic lights clearly showed Kearsley, hooray!

When we arrived at Hotel he seemed surly and moody, why?

He didn't even thank me for map reading.... Rolling eyes Whistling nnocently

Cruel evil woman. Why not just castrate him & be done with it! :O

Laughing out loud

Quote: lofthouse @ May 10 2011, 7:04 PM BST

I work with women in an office and I have to say they tend to be much more two faced than blokes!

They will slag someone off continually , yet as soon as that person wonders in theyre all pally and matey with them

hyopcrits!

And I just know they lez each other up whilst I have an aternoon wank in the gents

i read all about it in razzle

or hypo-chicks if you like

sorry.... :(

yeh life should be more like razzle 'snot fair

Quote: dellas @ May 10 2011, 8:03 PM BST

:P Loving these!

He thought his new sat-nav would be great at getting us to Coventry.

Twenty side streets and road works' later we were still back to Coventry outer ring bloody road.

Could No longer stand the female voice repeating 'At the next roundabout take the sixth exit' and Him saying 'Was that fifth or sixth?' I was feeling sick.

I turned it off used map and directed him into City centre, a left exit at traffic lights clearly showed Kearsley, hooray!

When we arrived at Hotel he seemed surly and moody, why?

He didn't even thank me for map reading.... Rolling eyes Whistling nnocently

Be fair. My lady is a sat-nav lover and had trouble on the Coventry ring-road. It's crap.

whoo? howw?? what the ???

HEY!!! :(

ahhhh where would we be without sat-nav?

Quote: JoLaw @ May 10 2011, 6:55 PM BST

If it helps, I was being sarcastic :)

Though if you do turn out to be a man, marry me please Smarmy

OBVIOUSLY.

Stop trying to lesbian me, you lesbian.

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