British Comedy Guide

Lack of Open Submissions

I'm not sure how true it is - due to be not being in the 'loop' - but there seems to be a lot of nostalgia for the days when anyone could submit work to any TV/radio show they fancied. These days there are very few open opportunities and I often wonder why. Is it because there are more people who see themselves as writers these days and the production companies can't cope with the influx? Is it a fear of the unknown by TV channels?

It's because you touch yourself at night.

But I think the simple answer is, with e-mail and the interweb it's so bloody easy to enter. That the readers get swamped and you should be able to make the most of what's out there.

I'd say it is the fear of the unknown. It may explain why Channel 4's Comedy Lab pilots always tend to get shown at around midnight.

That's a good point, Ian. I'm sure it must be great to get a comedy lab, but having it shown so late must be a little frustrating.

I suspect there is a lot more fear in commissioning these days which results in a more risk averse approach. It is easier and safer to trust a CV than to plough through a mountain of dross to pick out something which may or may not be a gem.

Nobody gives a shit much anymore in the departments responsible for commissioning etc. It is not creative led at the moment. Bean counters have taken over the asylum.

Also competition is higher than it ever's been before.

What with Sky out bidding everyone and endless cable channels producing low budget stuff the proles love.

I wonder if BBC Writers Room has had to reduce its number of readers with the cutbacks. I had seen something to that effect.

How many people does it take to operate a shredder?

A lot of writers feel like it's a slight against them. It just isn't. The truth is, no one cares about you. No one gives a flying cr** if you're any good because, to be honest, you could be awesome, but I can guarantee they have the phone number of someone who has proven themselves time and again to be awesome. Whereas you might be 'undiscovered'.

No one wants to 'discover you', because no one sees the point. The attitude is: "if you're good enough, we'll hear about you". So you have to make yourself heard about. We say 'oh its impossible', but the truth is people manage, otherwise the television industry would not exist. It does. Which means people are forcing their way through, and if we haven't, it's because we haven't discovered how to yet, or (something many of us will refuse to recognise ever) we are actually not very good.

You have to make your own opportunities. You have to force yourself forward. The name of the game is innovation. There's no such thing as the 'keyboard-bound-writer' these days. Those that sit there clicking on emails, waiting for things to happen, are hammering the nails into their own coffin.

Sure everything works once and a while, there's always a degree of luck, and I am not being cynical about any specific approach. All I'm saying is never expect (given that every person and their uncle believes they are God's gift to literature now) producers and companies to open their doors to your brilliance, because they know damned well that no matter how insanely wonderful your piece is, it's going to get swamped by a whole pile of pink-binded rubbish which they then have to deal with.

They don't see themselves (quite rightly) as responsible for you. It's up to no one but us to make ourselves successful. We have no real right to criticise the lack of open-submissions, because that is us believing they 'owe' us the chance. They just don't. We have to make it ourselves.

She's feisty, this one...

I don't think Ben or anyone else was necessarily suggesting that anyone "owes" you any favours as a writer. I think the major concerns would be to ensure that a) there is a relatively level playing field for entry-level writers to have at least some chance to prove their talent (or lack of it)... and b) that, as a result of a) there is more than a cursory effort on the part of the almighty networks to base their commissioning decisions on the quality of the scripts and ideas, not on convenient business relationships.

I've been plugging away at this writing lark for a few years now and so am very well aware that success usually has to be hard-won, however when some of the "product" that is reaching our TV screens (in both comedy and drama) is of such appallingly low writing standard, it is reasonable to question why genuine talent is not breaking through. And there is genuine talent out there. Also I would point out that, just because a writer maybe forceful and persistent, that does not necessarily make them gifted. Too many overly-respectful writers with really only very limited hack writing abilities have had their work produced in recent years, presumably because they are desperately willing to play any industry game - including rolling over and letting themselves be f**ked when it comes to script/concept changes. Where's the integrity in allowing your vision to be completely ruined (and mostly they are) just so that you can have the dubious glory of having your name on some soon-to-be-forgotten TV credits?

The stupid British public would rather watch f**king soap opera and the f**king likes of f**king, f**king Katie Price/Kerry Katona/Peter Andre so why pay for expensive comedy when none of the idiots are going to watch it.

But at least it proves I am in the top 10% of intelligent UK citizens so I win that way, if not by ever getting commissioned as a writer.

Score...

Dan
</massive, massive bugbear with a country who in the main shouldn't be allowed to breed>

Quote: swerytd @ April 30 2011, 11:58 PM BST

The stupid British public would rather watch f**king soap opera and the f**king likes of f**king, f**king Katie Price/Kerry Katona/Peter Andre so why pay for expensive comedy when none of the idiots are going to watch it.

Is this taken from that leaked secret BBC Mission Statement? :O

Quote: Tim Walker @ April 30 2011, 11:37 PM BST

She's feisty, this one...

I don't think Ben or anyone else was necessarily suggesting that anyone "owes" you any favours as a writer. I think the major concerns would be to ensure that a) there is a relatively level playing field for entry-level writers to have at least some chance to prove their talent (or lack of it)... and b) that, as a result of a) there is more than a cursory effort on the part of the almighty networks to base their commissioning decisions on the quality of the scripts and ideas, not on convenient business relationships.

I've been plugging away at this writing lark for a few years now and so am very well aware that success usually has to be hard-won, however when some of the "product" that is reaching our TV screens (in both comedy and drama) is of such appallingly low writing standard, it is reasonable to question why genuine talent is not breaking through. And there is genuine talent out there. Also I would point out that, just because a writer maybe forceful and persistent, that does not necessarily make them gifted. Too many overly-respectful writers with really only very limited hack writing abilities have had their work produced in recent years, presumably because they are desperately willing to play any industry game - including rolling over and letting themselves be f**ked when it comes to script/concept changes. Where's the integrity in allowing your vision to be completely ruined (and mostly they are) just so that you can have the dubious glory of having your name on some soon-to-be-forgotten TV credits?

I wasn't suggesting anyone 'here' is saying anything, I was commenting on an opinion I come across all the time. There is that fist-to-face feeling when you watch something terrible. But then again it is so difficult to argue about what is 'terrible'. Because, what we believe to be terrible, might be watched by more people than what we think is good.

So what this establishes is it is a business. We all knew that. Which brings me to agree with what you said about integrity (oh...that word). I agree, no one should have to bow down and be shafted by the industry, so why not try carving a niche elsewhere. I know people making names for themselves in online drama with just webcams! That's why I said 'innovation'. If you don't want to play the industry game you have to find ways around it because no one is going to show you how to do it.

In all, I'm not really trying to comment on anything other than a widespread attitude. It is just clear to me that no one of 'the powers that be' has any interest in helping any of us out. I'm not saying anyone sells out, because there's no room to even do that any more! To sell out you have to be hired first! There are decent, brilliant people out there, but they are as busy and as tired as anyone! They're not 'looking for you'. You have to do something, make something, enter something. That's what I think anyway.

Quote: Tim Walker @ April 30 2011, 11:37 PM BST

She's feisty, this one...

Yes, as EV-D9D would say to Sophie "You're a feisty little one, but you'll soon learn some respect. I have need for you on the master's sail barge, and I think you'll fill in nicely."

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