The In One Consolidatingly Royal Wedding Thread

According to the BBC website . .

Of the sample, some 31% said they "couldn't care less" about the event and a further 28% described themselves as "largely indifferent".

Now that leaves 41% of us who are really looking forward to plastic Union Flag bowler hats, jelly and ice cream, flags, street parties with neighbours we love to be with, dancing, singing Rule Britannia Jerusalem and the National Anthem and generally doing all those things that got us through the Blitz.

So Chums, what are your plans for the big day ?

Probably hitting Alton Towers with the little Rileys as it might be queue free. But defo wedding free.

Watching the news in the hope something goes wrong so I can write a sketch about it.

Which no one will buy.

I am a royalist I suppose but I really am not interested in any weddings. I find them a complete waste of time and money (P.S. - don't tell the wife!).

Hmmm. No sign of the 41% so far.

Me? I think I may be washing my hair that day.

Kate is a good looking girl but she needs a good feed. She needs to put on about 2 stone. I'll provide the first 10cc

Quote: Will Cam @ March 8 2011, 10:26 PM GMT

Kate is a good looking girl but she needs a good feed. She needs to put on about 2 stone. I'll provide the first 10cc

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To the tower with him!!

Quote: Blenkinsop @ March 8 2011, 10:26 PM GMT

To the tower with them, I'll keep nix!!

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Good lad!

She is a lovely girly and I'd like to protect her

oh and happy women's day everyone, get the kettle on!

I'm deliberately blanking my mind to the actual date. It will be boring shite with commentators telling you how many men are picking their noses 'as the royal coach drives down the blah blah blah'.
Watching this shite will turn you into a zombie.

Beware!

I'm banking on a 9/11 type of attack on the royal carriage where a corgi loaded with explosives is launched from a trebuchet located in Regents Park and disguised as a pair of Bernard Mannings underpants. You heard it here first.

I find weddings weirdly arousing. It's knowing that the bride will be getting a good seeing to that night. And Kate is quite attractive.

Quote: chipolata @ March 9 2011, 1:43 PM GMT

I find weddings weirdly arousing. It's knowing that the bride will be getting a good seeing to that night.

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There is a pecking order.

1. Prince Philip

2. Prince Charles

3. The Queen and Princess Anne

4. Prince Andrew and a certain American friend

5. Prince's William and Harry

6. The band of the Royal Dragoon Guards.

7. Charlie Sheen

We also have Zara and Mike's nuptials to look forward to. Bet we won't get a bank holiday for that. We do get one for the Queen's Diamond Jubilee next year so two out of three is not bad.

Quote: Loopey @ March 9 2011, 7:18 PM GMT

We do get one for the Queen's Diamond Jubilee next year

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Don't count on it.

I've got her in a double with Patrick Moore.