EXT. RIVERBANK. TWO OLD MEN WATCH A DUCK STRUGGLING TO SWIM UPSTREAM AGAINST THE CURRENT. THEY NOD AT EACH OTHER APPROVINGLY AND URGE THE DUCK ON. IT PERSEVERES AND EVENTUALLY STARTS TO MAKE PROGRESS.
TED:
Nature's wonderful, Harry! Isn't that a beautiful duck?
HARRY:
Joyous Ted! Imagine it roasted!
TED NODS ENTHUSIASTICALLY.
*removes animal rights hat* Made me laugh. Not a side splitter but I don't suppose it was meant to be. A little filler, me thinks 
*replaces animal rights hat* Duck abuser 
Ta mate! Naw, not a side splitter.. a little something for the Christmas Stocking..I am developing a couple of characters that like to admire things..
................................................................
LATER. AT THE TOWN MARKET TED & HARRY ARE PEOPLE WATCHING.
TED:
It's a wonderful life, Harry. I like to sit and watch people go by... it's so interesting, all the different type of folk!
HARRY:
Yes, I like it too, the young, the old, children.. and babies..
HARRY PAUSES AND ADOPTS A REVERANT POSTURE & EXPRESSION
HARRY:
All meat is good meat!
Now these two are developing as characters and I'm really beginning to like them as meat heads. That's a funny concept. They'll eat anything. 
I like it!!!
EXT. IT'S APPROACHING EVENING AND TED & HARRY ARE CROSSING THE VILLAGE GREEN.
TED:
Look Harry, there's that divorcee Mrs Spooner walking her poodle..
HARRY:
Yes..(PAUSE) are you thinking what I'm thinking, Ted..
TED:
..er, it'd be lovely as a roast?
HARRY:
mmm, but what about the poodle Ted?
That was the last one Mate (rule of three - after three it's boring, move on - Catherine Tate and Little Britain please note!)
Of course, the first one can be boring in some cases.. <thought I'd better say it.. 
>
Coincidentally, my Christmas Comp entry (yet to be posted) is called "A Christmas Prezzie for Jesus" which is quite a coincidence.. I must have been reading your mind, eh? 
I really like that little set. Nice one.
As for Jesus, glad I got mine in first!!! We're bad.
Yes, very funny Frankie
Don't bloody encourage him Marion!
Frankie, you really are quackers.
Yeah good sketch, although personally, I'd make it longer and cut it in half, as an opener n closer to a sketch show.
Quote: Frankie Rage @ December 15, 2007, 6:57 AMEXT. RIVERBANK. TWO OLD MEN WATCH A DUCK STRUGGLING TO SWIM UPSTREAM AGAINST THE CURRENT. THEY NOD AT EACH OTHER APPROVINGLY AND URGE THE DUCK ON. IT PERSEVERES AND EVENTUALLY STARTS TO MAKE PROGRESS.
TED:
Nature's wonderful, Harry! Isn't that a beautiful duck?HARRY:
Joyous Ted! Imagine it roasted!TED NODS ENTHUSIASTICALLY.
Personally I thought that was a bit lame - the sort of thing a 10 year old might say.
I thought the first sketch was just weak - what they said just wasn't shocking enough to me, if that was what it was supposed to be. I think it gets a bit more interesting as the concept develops, but if you're keeping it to just 3 sketches you need them all to be as strong as can be. I think it needs development somewhere.
Quote: David Chapman @ December 15, 2007, 1:50 PMPersonally I thought that was a bit lame - the sort of thing a 10 year old might say.
Now who's encouraging him!
I can just see theese 3 skeches in a sketch compilation, people see the first sketch and think "hmm mildy amusing but nothing great" then you hit them with the second one and it becomes all the more hillarious because they remember the first. Not sure the third really takes it that much further than the second though, it's still funny but generally when you do jokes in 3s the first doesn't go very far at all, the second takes it much further and then the third takes it to the extremes, whereas here the third just kinda went to the same place the second did, still funny though.