Careers Advice

Not to be taken too seriously.

INT. JOB CENTRE - DAY

DANNY (21 AND AVERAGE-LOOKING) IS SAT IN FRONT OF A COMPUTER, ANSWERING SKILLS-BASED QUESTIONS (HEADER = FUTURE CAREERS).

QUESTION 26. I TAKE PRIDE IN MY WORK - CLICKS QUITE LIKE ME
QUESTION 27. I LIKE TO BE HANDS-ON - CLICKS VERY MUCH LIKE ME
QUESTION 28. I CARE ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF ME - CLICKS VERY MUCH LIKE ME
QUESTION 29. I AM ANALYTICAL - CLICKS SOMETIMES LIKE ME
QUESTION 30. I LIKE TO WORK WITH OTHERS - CLICKS VERY MUCH LIKE ME

'END OF TEST' POPS UP. 'YOU'RE FUTURE CAREER IS NOW LOADING'. IT TAKES A LONG TIME TO LOAD.

DANNY
(IMPATIENTLY) Come on.

DANNY CALLS HELPER OVER. HE LOOKS BACK DOWN AT THE SCREEN 'PAEDOPHILE' IN HUGE LETTERS FILLS THE SCREEN, HE SCRABBLES TO CLOSE THE WINDOW AS THE HELPER APPROACHES; THE WINDOW CLOSES.

HELPER
Has it closed on you?

DANNY
...yeah...yeah! That's what happened.

HELPER
Right that's all sorted for you.

DANNY
Thanks.

THE HELPER WALKS AWAY. DANNY LOOKS BACK AT THE SCREEN SLIGHTLY RED-FACED.

DANNY
(UNDER HIS BREATH) Paedophile?! That's not even a career!

DANNY QUICKLY ANSWERS THE QUESTIONS AGAIN THEN WAITS FOR HIS CAREER. AFTER A SHORT DELAY 'PAEDOPHILE' COVERS THE SCREEN AGAIN. HE QUICKLY CLOSES THE WINDOW AND LOOKS UP. TWO POLICE OFFICERS ENTER AND LOOK IN DANNY'S DIRECTION; HE LOOKS LIKE HE IS ABOUT TO HYPERVENTILATE.

CUT TO:

INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT

DANNY WAKING UP IN BED HOT, SWEATY AND HYPERVENTILATING. HE LOOKS AROUND AND BREATHS A SIGH OF RELIEF.

DANNY
I just had a really horrible dream.

DANNY PULLS BACK THE DUVET COVER REVEALING A LITTLE BOY LAYING NEXT TO HIM IN SUPER TED PYJAMAS. DANNY'S FACE GOES WHITE AS A SHEET.

END

Not sure what you're trying to do here. I can't figure out the link to "'That's not even a career!" to him finding a boy in the bed with him.

I did laugh out loud when 'paedophile' appeared on the screen but didn't like the ending at all. Maybe something different from when the Police arrive. Could it involve the worker who helped him?

Good idea but punch is a little on the nose?

Basically, the start is all a horrible dream that leads danny to think he is a paedophile, then he wakes up thinking he isn't because it was all a dream, but pulls back the duvet to reveal a petrified little boy in his bed. Hhhhm, it seems to work in my head but it's not translating. Cheers, for your opinions.

Oh, I think I get you. But this is only relatable to paedophiles. Show it to them, they'll piss their dirty-scum-filled pants. The twats.

Quote: Leevil @ February 20 2011, 1:19 AM GMT

But this is only relatable to paedophiles.

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Really? Why?

Quote: Leevil @ February 20 2011, 1:19 AM GMT

Show it to them, they'll piss their dirty-scum-filled pants. The twats.

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I don't know any, other than the ones on this site, of course.

Quote: Corey O'Graffor @ February 20 2011, 1:39 AM GMT

Really? Why?

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Welllllll. How many times have you woken up with a small boy in your bed and whilst remembering you may fancy him? Answer VERY carefully.

Quote: Leevil @ February 20 2011, 1:41 AM GMT

Welllllll. How many times have you woken up with a small boy in your bed and whilst remembering you may fancy him? Answer VERY carefully.

View original

Hang on just let me check if I've put anything in the 'Who do you fancy?' thread.

Seriously though.

It is a good lead up, I was set up and ready for the punch. But it didn't make me laugh and left me a bit confused.

Thanks for the honest feedback.

Maybe Danny could wake sweating and explain to his companion that he is concerned about the terrible dream. As the covers of the bed are thrown back we see that danny is dressed as a milk maid/gimp/adolf hitler/bondage gear and he is in bed with afarmyard animal/priest/a henry the hoover??