Ishy steals female virgins' dreams and sells them to Wayne Rooney in exchange for his soiled and sweaty jockstraps.
Make an unfounded claim about the poster above you Page 56
Juan works as a receptionist in a swanky hotel. He's sleeping with the hotel manager.
EllieJP is missing the top right corner of her head after sliding down a pyramid as a child. There is photographic evidence.
Rob Wood robs Rob Woods' robwood.
If Rod Wood robs Rob Woods' robwood, would Rob Woods rob Rob Wood's robwoob in return?
One of you bastards should have the answer 
Will Cam recently entered a famous curmudgeon, genital lookalike competition. He won first prize with his Bernard Ingham.
Ishy was arrested early this morning with Vernon Kay and Jason Manford. They all spent the evening together comparing sex text techniques, and masturbating - whilst on the lash big time. It was at 4am whilst singing very loudly 'If you like a lotta chocolate on your biscuit join our club!' in the centre of Yeovil when local police were alerted - and acted accordingly. What a mess!
The best selling child's block is Lego.
The second is Duplo
Kerr knocks out counterfeits on his Norwich market stall called Dego and Luplo.
He gets a particular kick out of selling his wares to the blind
Rotter
Will Cam's brother, Web, invented a self-titled device for allowing people on the other side of the world to see you fiddle with your privates.
Rob Wood likes mice
Trapped in a vice
With pins in their eyeballs
He's not very nice
Will Cam was born to pun
He cannot be outrun
But he became undone
When he defrocked a nun
Shandonbelle
What the hell?
F**kin' hell
Shandonbelle
Nil's full name is
Nilbert Bartholemew Puttersby
Unfounded Steve! Unfounded!!!
Steve Sunshine and Captain Kirk are presently voyaging through time and space and will not be home for tea