INT. OFFICE - DAY
CHANNEL 4's HEAD OF PROGRAMMING IS SITTING AT HIS DESK DAYDREAMING
FADE TO RICKY GERVAIS HOSTING THE BRITISH COMEDY AWARDS
RICKY:
A lot of people still think that women aren't funny. They must have just watched 'Miranda'.
So Rob Brydon's up for best comedy actor award for The Trip, but Steve Coogan's been snubbed. That's like giving Spit the Dog an award and telling Bob Carolgees to f**k off.
You have to work hard to be a comedian; obviously Michael McIntyre is the exception that proves the rule.
I'd like to take this opportunity to thank Jack Whitehall. I always wanted to know what would happen if you crossed Russell Brand's style with Stewart Lee's material.
BACK TO REALITY AND A LOOK OF SHOCK ON THE MAN'S FACE
FADE TO FRANKIE BOYLE HOSTING THE BRITISH COMEDY AWARDS
FRANKIE:
Ant & Dec are up for the best comedy entertainment personality? These pair of c**ts haven't got a personality between them. They look like the result of an angry dwarf raping a down-syndromed midget. Twice.
Rob Brydon's also up for an award. I'm guessing it's not for most attractive male. That c**t looks like his mother was raped by a down-syndromed inkpad.
I can see Ian Hislop there in the audience. Looking like his mother was raped by a down-syndromed pool ball.
And there's Jo Brand, looking looks like she has just been raped by...hang on, I've spotted the flaw.
BACK TO REALITY AND A LOOK OF SHEER TERROR ON THE MAN'S FACE
FADE TO JONATHAN ROSS HOSTING THE BRITISH COMEDY AWARDS
JONATHAN IS BEING A CONSUMMATE PROFESSIONAL; THE COMICS IN THE AUDIENCE ARE HAVING A GREAT TIME
BACK TO REALITY
CHANNEL 4's HEAD OF PROGRAMMING:
I think I'll cancel that Lifetime Achievement Award for Andrew Sachs.
Gerry, I want to be the first BCGer to nominate this sketch for best sketch of 2011.
Thanks very much Will.
Good work.
