British Comedy Guide

Radio for the blind

Another radio sketch. just finished so a bit rubbish - poor ending - i ran out of steam.

cheers

Radio for the blind!! (or visually impaired)

Doreen: Oh Deidre I’m fed up with having to scrub these dishes day and night to get rid of these stubborn stains.

V/O: Doreen holds up a soiled plate.

Deidre: well Doreen now you don’t have to, thanks to new Suds‘n’clean!

V/O: Deidre holds up a brand new bottle of Suds‘n’clean and smiles widely and helpfully

Doreen: oh Deidre what’s that? Will it help with these ever so stubborn stains?

V/O: Doreen repeats her previous action by holding up a soiled plate.

Deidre: why yes Doreen, with new Suds‘n’clean you let the washing up do itself.

V/O: Deidre holds up a strikingly clean plate.

Doreen: oh lovely

V/O: Doreen lights a cigarette

Deidre: you see Doreen new Suds‘n’clean contains concentrated enzymes that break down food quicker than the other leading products

V/O: Deidre scratches her thigh and begins to dance the Charleston. A crude diagram portrays said cleaning product breaking down pieces of dry food. It is reminiscent of the battle of Troy but with fewer Greeks.

Deidre: You see Doreen the concentrated enzymes break down the food lick-a-de split. So it’s easy to wipe away. See.

V/O: Deidre wipes away the food from the soiled plate and Doreen picks her nose with her foot.

Doreen: That’s amazing Deidre!

V/O: Doreen pours herself a large scotch

Doreen (cont’d): and that’s without any scrubbing!!

V/O: Doreen retires to floor in ambiguity.

Deidre: That’s Right Doreen! For less scrubbing and clean bright plates choose Suds ‘n’ Clean!

V/O: Deidre smiles and grimaces simultaneously and then a fanatical and highly stressed dyslexic turns up unannounced to complain about the Dewey Decimal System.

nothing......

Maybe it's your signature?

I think there's mileage in this blind radio idea, I'm just not convinced a washing up ad is the way to best exploit it. Keep running with it though...

Oh please do a radio for the deaf. Paweeeeeeease!

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