Quote: sootyj @ December 17 2010, 11:29 PM GMTBottoms are very useful
For disposing of shit
But for keeping all your bits
It's not the most comfortable fit
Very useful poems Page 2
Lions are very useful
For cold callers their really a treat
They'll try to sale me Energy
And he'll eat them down to their feet.
Paedophiles are very useful
For keeping kids in line
But if you show them granny
They'll sing them Old Langsine
Rome is very useful
For gazing oe'r the Tiber
But don't try to be Emperor
They stab you in the Khyber.
Proof reading is very useful
To ensure your poems scan
Add one too many syllables
And its rhythm goes right down the pan.
The Universe is useful
It started with a bang
Some people say different
But I'm not in their gang.
Slugs are very loyal pets,
but they die before their time,
when you go to feed them,
all you find is slime.
Haiku is useful,
To get the first 3 bits done,
But there's no punchline.
A fuel gauge is useful
But useless if ignored you see
I found that out once
Had to call the RAC
Sandwiches are useful.
For putting in your tum
But now you're all expecting
A line that ends with 'bum'.
Vibrators are useful
To stimulate the clit
But when shoving up the bottom
They get covered all in shit
Girls are very useful
They have tits at the front
But that's not a girl has,
She also has a personality.
Legs are very useful
They reach down to your feet
If you were without them
You'd be confined to your seat.
Comedians are useful
The public ought to thank us
But few are brilliant like me
The rest of them are wasting their time
I tried to fill my inner ear
With a few drops of my favourite beer
But all of the fizzy
Made me dizzy
And I fell down on my rear
End