Hi All
(EDIT -- VERSION 2.2 HERE: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WVizqNumBDg ) Have had another cut at the cartoon. Hope this version works better. If anyone can give their opinion as to whether this edit is better than previous ones that would be grand.
Oh, and ny thoughts on the script, look, acting, sound, music, etc, would be great. I don't think this is the final version; would still like to tinker with it.
Thanks
Yacob
I like the idea, but it could lose a line or two and be a little funnier. I especially enjoyed "Eerie Daaarknessssss" 
The animation is very neat (almost peachy) and I really liked the corn for some reason.
The scrolling jokes at the bottom are funny, but the script didn't make me laugh that much. I think more conflict between the two would have made it funnier - perhaps with the newsreader storming off set.
Cheers Nil and Ben
I might re-cut this to make it as short as possible and then get to work on something else. Right now I'm thinking of getting rid of everything after "The thing that makes it day" line and before the "No, no, no, because... because... be- am I fired?" line (I'll stick the new edit up on this thread soon. Hopefully it'll be an improvement).
If anyone has any thoughts on what bits I should cut then let me know (I'm not very good at judging this piece). Oh, and any comments on anything else regarding the cartoon would be great.
Best
Yac X
Quote: Ben @ December 12 2010, 1:25 PM GMTThe animation is very neat (almost peachy) and I really liked the corn for some reason.
The scrolling jokes at the bottom are funny, but the script didn't make me laugh that much. I think more conflict between the two would have made it funnier - perhaps with the newsreader storming off set.
I can just echo this.
I watched some of your older vids. They're pretty good, I liked the Dinosaur Dentist especially.
Quote: Yacob Wingnut @ December 12 2010, 3:16 PM GMTIf anyone has any thoughts on what bits I should cut then let me know (I'm not very good at judging this piece). Oh, and any comments on anything else regarding the cartoon would be great.
Best
Yac X
I'd cut part of the line where the reporter says about the 'crop circle' appearing behind his car, that's obvious from the aerial shot.
pretty good mate liked the style could of chopped some of the lines like him describing what the light was to make it move faster but overall not to bad my friend.
Cheers guys. Have done another edit of the sketch (the link to it is in my opening post). Basically I've just cut the whole crop message thing. Thoughts as to whether it works better than previous versions would be nice.
I'm not sure about adding more conflict between the newsreader and the reporter. Possibly (I'm tired and ill right now. Thinking takes too much effort)
Gavin -- Sorry if I'm a bit thick but what lines in particular do you mean? The reporter talking about the UFO before he's told what it was? The newsreader telling the reporter what the UFO was? Or the reporter telling the newsreader he's still sure the lights were due to aliens?
Thanks peeps
Yac
That is loads better, Yac,
I'd like to see the anchorman spin around to (half) face the reporter and give his last line and, maybe have the reporter gulp or make a nervy noise, but it's not essential.
Cheers Nil. I should have mentioned earlier I'm trying to make something that's suitable for kids, so I don't think I can make the line at the end sound too much like a threat.