INT: SALESFLOOR
A SALESMAN (BRIAN) IS SELLING A COFFIN TO A VAMPIRE, THEY SHAKE HANDS, VAMPIRE EXITS. BRIAN WALKS OVER TO A WHITEBOARD AND ADDS ANOTHER SALE TO THE 'BRIAN' COLUMN. THE 'COLIN' COLUMN HAS NO SALES.
CAMERA PULLS BACK TO REVEAL COLIN, LOOKING UNIMPRESSED.
COLIN: How do you look in the mirror?
BRIAN: <SARCASTIC> Is that a snidey remark, or do you really not know?
COLIN: No, I don't. How can you sell to 'one of them'?
BRIAN: Their money's the same colour as ours. Not that you'd know, loser!
COLIN: They come over here, taking our jobs....
BRIAN: They're not taking 'my' job, I think it's the hours that puts them off...
COLIN: Months ago there'd be corpses lined up out that door.
BRIAN: No wonder you don't get any business.
COLIN: It's not my fault nobody dies these days.
BRIAN: True, but like it or not, they're here to stay.
COLIN: 'Undertaking is a Job for Life', they lied.
BRIAN: You need to adjust your business model. Think outside the box.
COLIN: I don't know anything about Vampires.
BRIAN: You'll pick it up. < THROWS A 'TWILIGHT' DVD AT COLIN.>
COLIN: How's that meant to help? I'm not a teenage girl!
BRIAN: No, but you have transferable skills. Here, read this in the car....
<THROWS A 'TAXIDERMY FOR DUMMIES' BOOK AT COLIN.>
COLIN: I don't understand.
BRIAN: It's Vampires v Werewolves over on Eerie Beach tonight. Let's make a killing!