INT: THE TREATMENT ROOM AT THE ACCIDENT AND EMERGENCY WARD.
Mr Ash is sat on the edge of the bed wearing a hospital gown.
Dr Juut enters holding a clipboard.
DR:Mr Ash?
MR Ash: Hello doctor.
DR:Well Mr Ash. What seems to be the problem?
MR Ash: Well to be quite honest… it’s a bit embarrassing.
DR:Mr Ash look around you. This is a hospital and I’m a doctor.
MR Ash: I know but…
DR:Mr Ash please.
MR Ash: Well… it was an accident… in the garden.
DR: A garden accident? Well that’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Did you cut yourself?
MR Ash: No.
DR
o what happened?
MR Ash: I was watering the lettuce patch, before I went to bed…
DR:Yes?
MR Ash: And I tripped over some pots.
DRo… you’ve had a bump?
MR Ash: Kind of.
DR: Mr Ash I think it will be easier if you just show me the problem.
MR Ash: Well if you’re certain.
DR:I am.
Mr Ash: Alright then.
Mr Ash gets down from the bed and touches his toes.
Dr Juut looks confused. He pauses before lifting the back of the gown.
DR:Good lord!... That’s… … that’s a carrot.
Mr Ash: I know!
DR:A very… large carrot. How did you say this happened?
Mr Ash: I was gardening and I fell over some pots, and onto the carrot patch.
DR:Well Mr Ash, you have a serious problem.
Mr Ash starts crying uncontrollably.
Mr Ash: Oh Christ!... can’t you get it out?
DR: Oh I can get it out… That’s not your problem.
Mr Ash: What do you mean?
DR:Well from what I’m looking at… You carrots are growing upside down.
