The Restaurant Critic

I think this may have been funnier in my head than written down. All comments welcome.

INTERVIEWER:
So, I hear you were down at Gordon Ramsey's new place.

CRITIC:
Yeah, I popped in last week.

INTERVIEWER:
How was the food?

CRITIC:
Disappointing really. It all tasted of sick to me.

INTERVIEWER:
Really? That's shocking. What did they say?

CRITIC:
Didn't get a chance to say, the bloody waiter chased me out as soon as he saw me.

INTERVIEWER:
Terrible. I suppose Ramsey always was sensitive to criticism. How about The Fat Duck.

CRITIC:
Well, Blumenthal is the arch experimenter, but I have to say I found his dishes to have a taint to them.

INTERVIEWER:
A taint?

CRITIC:
Yes, a definite edge of vomit.

INTERVIEWER:
Again?

CRITIC:
(Suddenly defensive) I can't help what I find, my finely honed palate detected regurgitated gastric juices.

INTERVIEWER:
OK. How about Marco Pierre White?

CRITIC:
Chunder.

INTERVIEWER:
Raymond Blanc's Mnoir Au Quatre Saisons?

CRITIC:
Puke.

INTERVIEWER:
This is ridiculous. You are suggesting that the food at all the finest restaurants in the country tastes of vomit?

CRITIC:
I can only speak as I find... although...

INTERVIEWER:Yes?

CRITIC:It's just that, I suppose, I am a fly.

I saw it coming pretty quickly, but it's still OK and well written.

Thanks Leevil. I wasn't sure how obvious the punch was early on,so that's useful feedback. as I said, it may have ben better in my head.

I didn't see it coming and thought it funny

Thanks Bushbaby. Would you have seen it coming without the red wine

The sketch is funny and anyone who saw the punchline coming deserves a pat on the back as they're undoubtedly among the top 0.01% of punchline-guessers in the world today.

Would it be improved if the 'reveal' were done by pulling back and showing the critic to have a fly's head rather than by his telling us he's a fly?

Maybe, but it's still very funny as it stands.

I liked it.
And it's not predictable at all IMO.
In fact I thought he'd just been throwing up, which he was but he was a fly which I didn't see coming

Obviously there's not many clues to an actual fly. And I didn't call it predictable directly. I'm just really good.

Quote: Ming the Mirthless @ September 29 2010, 6:45 PM BST

The sketch is funny and anyone who saw the punchline coming deserves a pat on the back as they're undoubtedly among the top 0.01% of punchline-guessers in the world today.

Would it be improved if the 'reveal' were done by pulling back and showing the critic to have a fly's head rather than by his telling us he's a fly?

Maybe, but it's still very funny as it stands.

View original

Thanks Ming. I think the visual reveal would work well. I was sort of thinking radio when I wrote it which is why I went with the verbal. I also wonder what visuals you might use up to the reveal?

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ September 29 2010, 9:16 PM BST

I liked it.
And it's not predictable at all IMO.
In fact I thought he'd just been throwing up, which he was but he was a fly which I didn't see coming

View original

Thanks Steve.

Quote: Leevil @ September 29 2010, 11:16 PM BST

Obviously there's not many clues to an actual fly. And I didn't call it predictable directly. I'm just really good.

View original

I think I might have misinterpreted you. Sorry. You da man.

Quote: Ponderer @ September 29 2010, 11:37 PM BST

Thanks Ming. I think the visual reveal would work well. I was sort of thinking radio when I wrote it which is why I went with the verbal. I also wonder what visuals you might use up to the reveal?

View original

You'd just have a normal 'two blokes at a table' scene (maybe in a pub?) but there'd be no shots of the critic's head.

After a short while, that would alert the astute viewer to the possibility that the critic's face might be the key to the sketch but that would be part of the fun.

Only the very sharpest and cleverest of viewers would guess he's a fly.

I'm pretty sharp and clever (I think) but I didn't see it coming.

Ah. OK. I can see how that would work. Thamks, Ming.