Reassuring Dad

INT. BEDROOM - EVENING.

A father sees his son upset and tries to comfort the child.

DAD
What's up, son?

SON
Dad, what's gonna happen when the world ends?

DAD
Lots of screaming probably-

SON
What?

DAD
And agonizing pain-

SON (Scared)
Huh?

DAD (Intense)
Blood, guts and bones everywhere.

SON (Panicking)
Dad?!

DAD (Eyes glazed over)
The horror son. The horror!

SON
You're scaring me.

DAD
Good! Fear keeps the heart beating.

The boy lays petrified. The Dad fluffs his son's hair and leaves the room where he meets the Mother on the landing.

MUM
I think I'll tuck him in tomorrow night.

END

That's nice, but I am not sure it quite stands alone as is. You could perhaps make a runner out of it, or maybe add a twist.

Too brief it needs a more specific context such as terrorism or nuclear war

Also very similar to that Peter Kay add.

I was going to have the Dad describing more horrific stuff but then I decided against it because I thought the joke was already there, no need to thin it out.

Not seen the Peter Kay ad.

Cheers, guys.

I think it should end something like....

MUM
I guess that lets YOU off tucking him in every night

Yeah, but I like the idea of the Dad being sincere. Cheers BB.

Needs a better out Leevil. For me, it builds to nothing and it's also a bit cruel. I think you need to either come up with an unexpected killer ending to justify the sketch, or maybe subvert it in some way so the kid gets the upper hand in the end. At the moment it's a joke without a punchline.

Quote: Lee Henman @ September 19 2010, 3:09 AM BST

it's also a bit cruel

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I'd agree with this. However, Armstrong and Miller had that Dad character who would always tell his son that he was the reason that his parents split up. I guess they're allowed to be a bit cruel though as they're Armstrong and Miller.

I like the lead up, Leevil, but the ending lacks bite.

Noted. Will have a think of an alt' later. Cheers

Maybe the mum could come in after and be worse, instead of meeting on the stairs.

Quote: Nil Putters @ September 19 2010, 8:40 PM BST

Maybe the mum could come in after and be worse, instead of meeting on the stairs.

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What a bastard!

Will have a tink!

Lovely crisp dialogue and correct in its brevity. To be honest I didn't find much wrong with it and perhaps sometimes expanding an idea can dilute its essence.

Well written imo.

Thanks evertsen. I've always liked you.

I like that you respond to almost every comment, Leevil. Very polite!