JAMES BOND IS ENTERING M'S OFFICE
M
Ah commander Bond I need to talk to you about an urgent matter of national security.
BOND
Of course M, is it Blofeld? Scaramanga?
M
No Bond it's a new terrble threat, a monsterous new threat...Dirty Yfronts.
BOND
Dirty Yfronts? Look if this is about me spending my MI6 laundry allowance on vodka and escorts, I can explaiN
M
No he's an evil drycleaner from Kazakhstan. He's going to block out the sun with a giant atomic skid mark.
Q
For this mission 007 we've prepared some specal equipment. Now do pay attention 007.
Q HOLDS UP A STRING VEST AND A CRUSTY SOCK.
Q
An armoured vest and a sock 100 times harder and less maleable than a regular sock.
BOND
But sir they're quite maloderous. I'm licensed to kill not make you ill.
Q
We've thought of that.
HANDS BOND A PACKET OF FEBREEZE
2 squirts of this and they'll be fine to wear for a week.
MONEYPENNY WALKS IN
BOND
Ah miss fishy knicker I can smell you have quite the catch of the day.
MONEYPENNY SLAPS HIM
BOND (TO CAMERA)
Why when we ran out of the books to make films on did we have to start on his laundry lists?
HE IS KNOCKED OUT BY A FLYING SOCK WITH A BOWLING BALL IN IT WHEELED BY A GIANT KOREAN WHO IS HOPPING WITH ONE BARE FOOT.
M
Eek it's Odd Sock!
